Grapevine Accidentally Confirms My Suspicions
Separated at birth?

Those who follow Not Now Silly closely know how much fun I have kicking at Tom Falco, Grammarian at the Coconut Grove Grapevine.

Yes, I am still contemplating a libel lawsuit against him for a scurrilous attack upon my character. Although, he deleted the comment thread immediately after I demanded an apology, he has still not done so, nor has he retracted his lie.

He has, however, blocked my email address, which is why I now rely solely on public communication with him. [Hiya, Tom!]

I have also written about his egregious attacks on the English language many times over the years. I’m not talking about a simple typo like the example below. No, I’m talking about run-on sentences, which combine several distinct thoughts, while leaving out the punctuation that would have made it readable.

However, what bothers me the most is Falco’s total disregard for the tenets of journalism, while pretending to be one. I have suggested [devoid of real proof] how he probably posts adverts and/or advertorials in exchange for goods, services, and/or meals. Let’s be clear: There’s nothing illegal in this. In the business this is called a “contra deal” and amyone who works in the promotional field understands how this works. However, the unscrupulous will use these deals to trade in the underground barter economy. Nothing is reported. No money exchanges hands. Nothing to see here.

I have also alleged [without any proof whatsoever] that Tom Falco will take ad dollars from certain parties and then look the other way, especially if there is something disreputable that might pop up. While I was still trying to save the E.W.F. Stirrup House from Demolition by Neglect, I could not get Falco to help with that campaign.

This took place at the very same time the Grapevine was accepting advertising dollars from one of the parking concerns in the city.

I’ve also wondered whether this was part of a contra deal, but life’s too short

I have written about the Playhouse Parking Lot many times over the years and will, no doubt, have reasons to do so in the near future. I have alleged that Paradise Parking was illegally squatting on the Playhouse Parking Lot and collecting those revenues, as opposed it going into the city coffers.

Paradise Parking has a familial relationship with the developer who built The Monstrosity; the same developer who also loaned the bankrupt Coconut Grove Playhouse a sum of money (the amount of which no one has ever revealed to this reporter, ‘tho’ I’ve asked). He felt as if these parking lot revenue was his tribute for the loan. No one knows how many dollars were scraped off the top of that parking lot before the Miami Parking Authority finally claimed authority over it.

In fact, in order to evict Paradise Parking from the lot, Miami-Dade County gifted the Bicycle Shop to the developer just to get rid of him. Therefore, there’s no doubting the back-channel connection between these entities.

Did the ad revenue from Paradise Parking influence Falco to look the other way? During all that time the Grapevine ignored actual news stories about the E.W.F. Stirrup House and the Playhouse parking lots, not to mention the destruction of historic homes in West Grove.

TO BE FAIR: Falco is all over the destruction of historic homes and lot splitting now that the White areas of Coconut Grove are under threat of gentrification. His neighbourhood.

But, I digress.

I discovered this recent Grapewhine at the Grapevine. Now, tell the truth. Does this sound like a journalist or someone with their hand out? Asking for a friend.

Schmuck is as schmuck does.

Falco thinks a payoff to write a positive story is beneath him, although he doesn’t seem absolutely sure. Yet all signs point to the fact that this is what he has done in the past, whether it’s cold hard cash or something else. However, it sounds like he’d take an advert to write a positive story.

What truly cracks me up about the post from which I stole that screen grab [find your own damned link], is that Falco tells several specific stories about nasty developers, yet never names a single one. Which advertisers is he protecting now? Asking for a friend.

POST SCRIPT: After editing this article, I let it stew for a few days. I wasn’t entirely sure I wanted to take another swipe at the hapless trust fund baby. Especially after mutual friends keep begging me to leave the poor guy alone. “He’s suffered enough.”

This morning I gave this post another read-through and decided WHAT THE HELL? I may as well publish it. However, before hitting the publish button I ventured into Grapevine Country to see if there was anything worth updating. That’s when I discovered Tom’s taking the summer off and may never come back at all.

Was it something I said?

About Headly Westerfield

Calling himself “A liberally progressive, sarcastically cynical, iconoclastic polymath,” Headly Westerfield has been a professional writer all his adult life.