Judge Not 8 ► Bob Costas Control
Totally unretouched pic of Judge Nap
taken directly from my tee vee set

Not even Bob Costas making an obvious statement about gun violence was enough to goose Judge “Andy” Nap’s output any higher this week. At 31 posts, Judge Nap’s bluster was only slightly higher than last week’s tally. It’s still within the margin of error, however.

TO BE FAIR: Judge Nap was not the only Fox personality to jump on Bob Costas’ gun remarks during the week; He was just the most hypocritical. Let’s get right to this exciting episode of Judge Not:

‘Like’ if you think Bob Costas is entitled to his opinion. When talking about guns is outlawed, only outlaws will talk about guns.

No basis? Should Costas have talked about garotting instead?

What if there were no more hypothetical questions? Then Judge Nap would be left with nothing but hypocritical questions.

I’m screwed. I have neither guns, nor gold. I guess I’ll be Zombie bait instead. Me and Bob Costas.

What if the right to keep and bear arms only applied to the veterans?

What if the right to keep and bear arms only applied to the TSA?

Judge Andy thinks it’s fair game to compare President Woodrow Wilson with Adolph Hitler. The Daily Caller thinks the ‘pull quote’ is fair game for the headline. Judge Nap then feels it’s fair game to pass along the Daily Caller’s interview with his brain-dead followers. That’s how the circle of life works.

I bet there are cops who want to do away with the 4th Amendment and Miranda Rights, too. Cops can say what they like, just like Bob Costas. Just because some cops want this, doesn’t mean it will happen. Just like Bob Costas. Get a grip, Judge.

Yes, Judge, the unemployment figures are terrible. Worse however, are the statistics on income inequality. A recent article in The Atlantic says income equality is worse now than in 1774. Forbes, which is clearly in the tank for the Democratic Party, has a recent article called “How Income Inequality Is Damaging the U.S.” HuffPo has two articles filled with charts that you should also read, Judge Nap. Just the other day it published “5 Ways Rising Income Inequality Kills The American Dream,” while in 2011 it published “15 Facts About U.S. Income Inequality That Everybody Should Know.” I’m sorry, Judge Andy, what were you saying about unemployment again?

However, here’s a chart you should also take a look at, Judge Nap:

I’m sorry, Judge Andy. What were you saying about unemployment again?

I’ll believe it when I see it, just like all those other Conspiracy Theories you pass along, all of which have yet to come to fruition.

That won’t fit on a bumper sticker: Judge Andy is the star with which to steer the Ship of State, which is listing badly. The problem is that Forbes is 100% serious. Pay no attention to that iceberg dead ahead.

Once again: Do I have to explain to you how this works? Police can propose, but they don’t pass the laws.

Where’s your outrage, Judge Andy? Did Arizona just hire a mercenary army to fight the War on Drugs to fill the mercenary’s for-profit jail? Isn’t that just a minor Conflict of Interest?

I thought the Republicans wanted to take the country back . . . back to the ’50s . . . the 1850s. See what I did there?

Where’s your outrage, Judge Nap?

Where’s your outrage, Judge Nap? Telling ‘Merkins what they can and cannot do in their cars?  A man’s car is his castle. His castle on wheels.

Wall Street got bailed out, but not Main Street. Where’s your outrage, Judge Nap?

Of course we can forgive Judge Nap for promoting his book . . . over and over again. One day I may even get around to reading it. How long does it take for a book like this to end up on the remaindered table?

Where’s your outrage, Judge Nap?

I though politicians were sent to Washington to get laws passed. Compromise is necessary to get that done, Judge Nap. Drawing lines in the sand is a good tactic for a schoolyard bully. Ask your buddy Bully Boy Bolling ’bout that. However, here’s what everyone needs to know: When a Fox “News” personality is giving advice to Republicans, and it happens far more often than you would think appropriate, it’s just more proof that Fox “News” is not “Fair and Balanced.” Never has been. Never will be. Thanks for playing our home game, Judge Nap.

Those are the only two choices?

This is the 3rd time this week I caught Judge Andy scare-mongering this. It must be what keeps Judge Nap awake at nights, even though he knows better.

Judge Nap wrote an article in which he argued, essentially, that Republicans are for Big Government and Democrats are for Even Bigger Government. See what he did there? A pox on all their houses.

This story is nothing more than a run-of-the-mill divorce custody battle. Like many others of this kind, it has crossed international borders. Like some others it involves a ‘Merkin serviceman. However, Fox “News” is determined to turn this family matter into a national “news” story, and Judge Andy is happy to help.

Republicans only want a government big enough to handle a uterus.

One of the biggest Senate Teabaggers is leaving the Senate to become King of the Teabaggers. How will that work out? Why let’s ask Judge Andy. Heya, Judge. What does this mean for the GOP?

Wait!!! What??? Libertarians [which are really just Teabaggers with a fancier name and less overt racism] will rejoin the disgraced GOP, pushing it even further to the right? Pass the popcorn, Judge.

This is the last book promo I will allow this week, Judge Nap.

This is the last Jim DeMint promo I will allow this week, Judge Nap.

Where’s your outrage, Judge Nap?

Where’s your outrage, Judge Nap?

By the end of the week Bob Costas was just a memory for Judge Nap. He’s now been supplanted by Black Boxes, compiled text messages, and conspiracies of Big Government.

Here’s a quote for you, Judge Nap:

“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Blessed are the cheesemakers.

About Headly Westerfield

Calling himself “A liberally progressive, sarcastically cynical, iconoclastic polymath,” Headly Westerfield has been a professional writer all his adult life.