Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Is Normal ► Today’s Ablow Job

Welcome to another fun-filled episode of Ablow Job. Not since Loofah Lad dumped Body Language Expert Tonya Reiman has there been such an idiotic segment on the Fox “News” Channel as “Normal or Nuts.”

That’s the official name of the weekly Wednesday Laugh-0-Thon that is really Ablow Job. Here’s how it normally [no pun intended] works: Those Foxy Friends on the Fox and Friends Curvy Couch drag out pop psychiatrist Dr. Keith Ablow and ask him to weigh in viewers’ emails to determine whether the average Fox “News” viewer is — err — normal or nuts. No, really. That’s it.

This week they dispensed with emails for a special all-Toronto Mayor Rob Ford edition of Normal or Nuts. The Foxy Friends asked Ablow to diagnose the crack smoking, drunk driving, criminal-hiring Mayor-In-Denial of the city I consider home, based on a few video clips. While everyone in the civilized world has recognized Mayor Rob Ford as a (gravy) train wreck, Ablow seems to think that Ford is simply misunderstood. Not even The Three Stooges were nuts enough to pick up what Dr. Keith was laying down. Watch:

While he called Ford a narcissist, Ablow also thinks Ford is “refreshing” because:
He’s direct, he’s clear, he says, “I know who my enemies are. I’m engaged and this is a battle to the end.” And, yannow what? If I were someone opposed to him, I’d say, “Wait! The game is on.”
No, Ablow really said that.
When Ford knocked over a a collegue last week while barreling over to the public peanut gallery, Abow seemed to think there was nothing abnormal about that behaviour since:
Number One: This woman kinda swoons. She doesn’t quite hit the deck. She kinda falls in a slow motion fashion, she gets up, and tries to comfort him. She may have a job as a therrapist in the future. I think he was doing a Chris Christie imitation, where Christie confronts people directly who are heckling him. He does it much more elegantly, but this guy’s channeling American [sic] politics.
Never mind that the only reason the woman didn’t fall over completely was because Ford caught her after he knocked her down. Even Steve Doocy, not always the smartest of Stooges, knew Ablow was full of shit when he responded, “I’m worried about you, Keith.”

Yet, Ablow says nothing about the bullying that Ford was engaged in at that exact moment in time when he was rushing over to the public peanut gallery to defend his brother, who was already heckling the citizens of Toronto. Had he not been such a bully in a china shop, he wouldn’t have given that woman a fat lip.
 The last video example has Rob Ford blaming his woes on “tax and spend socialists” on Toronto City Council. Dr. Forehead doesn’t think Ford is being paranoid at all:
“I’m not having this guy in my office ’cause he doesn’t need to come. He’s looking more and more NORMAL all the time. He probably is right about his detractors. Here’s a guy who stands up, and says, “Look, I’m not going to be a two-faced guy . . .”
Meanwhile, Doocy is yelling, “Hold it!!! Hold it!!! What about the crack smoking?!?!?!”
“Well, at least he admits it,” is this psychiatrist’s reply, proving he’s never dealt with people in denial about their substance abuse problems and alcoholism. At that the entire Curvy Couch erupted in laughter. Even they’re smart enough to finally realize Dr. Keith is a fraud.


A song for everything and everything for a song!

About Headly Westerfield

Calling himself “A liberally progressive, sarcastically cynical, iconoclastic polymath,” Headly Westerfield has been a professional writer all his adult life.