Headlines Du Jour ► Monday, December 23, 2013

No sooner does Not Now Silly fire one set of interns over labour unrest, than this new cabal shows its true colours. Inexplicably, despite the letters of recommendation which is sole the reward of all unpaid interns, they’re now demanding the holidays off. They’re starting with Christmas, but before they’re done they’ll be wanting to take Bahá’u’lláh’s Birthday off. It has to stop somewhere. I am now interviewing interns. Apply within.

FREE THE WEED!!!

The Media Should Stop Pretending Marijuana’s
Risks Are a Mystery — The Science Is Clear

FREE THE VEGETABLE!!!

In Florida, A Turf War Blooms Over
Front-Yard Vegetable Gardening

MUSICAL DISPATCHES FROM DETROIT, ‘MERKA’S FIRST THROWAWAY CITY:

Derrick May: ‘I stick around in Detroit because it’s my home No 1’

Music is missing link in Detroit recovery

A triumphant Aretha Franklin rocks MotorCity Sound Board

CRACK MAYOR CORNER:

In Toronto, aid to flow even without emergency declaration

Rob Ford is Canada’s Newsmaker of the Year
Astronaut Chris Hadfield is distant No. 2

CRACKER CORNER:

Lt Gov: Duck Dynasty
important to La. tourism

Mike Huckabee Drags Obama Into Duck Dynasty Controversy

Juan Williams: Right Wanted Bashir, Maher
Fired, But ‘Cry Foul’ Over Duck Dynasty Star?

ALASKAN CRACKER CORNER:

Good Grief and Great Tits
Dan Savage: Sitting Down to Read Sarah
Palin’s Christmas Book While I Bake
Christmas Cookies for My Family

IN FLORI-DUH NEWS:

A Blue Florida? State Supreme Court Slaps Down Rick Scott’s Gerrymandering

GET OUT YOUR HANDKERCHIEFS:

Emotional moment guitar legend Carlos Santana is reunited with his old drummer after discovering he had been living as a BEGGAR on the streets for 40 years

I GOTCHER WAR ON CHRISTMAS RIGHT HERE:

Pastor Joel Osteen Smacks Down Fox News ‘War On Christmas’ Victimology

IN THE COURTS:

Apartheid-Era Doctor Who Made
Germs To Kill Africans Found
Guilty Of Unprofessional Conduct

Brooklyn Convict Gets $560,000 In Damages For False Arrest

VIDEO DU JOUR:

 

[NB: NSFW OR WHILE DRINKING COFFEE]

New Wearable Computer Also Sucks Your Dick

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of Not Now Silly, home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic, and your rest stop on the Information Highway. Use our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open thread.

About Headly Westerfield

Calling himself “A liberally progressive, sarcastically cynical, iconoclastic polymath,” Headly Westerfield has been a professional writer all his adult life.