Tag Archives: Crack

Headlines Du Jour ► Monday, December 2, 2013

Welcome to another thrill-packed edition of Headlines Du Jour. Today I am adding to the format slightly. When appropriate I will be printing quotes from the articles cited to give more context and/or irony. Today there happens to be two such headlines that deserved more context. So, let’s get right to the news while it’s still fresh.

TODAY IN LGBT NEWS:

Florida Tea Party Leader Bashes Gay GOP Group

TEABAGGED ENOUGH ALREADY?


Santorum: Denying women birth control
coverage is a First Amendment right

OH! OH!! CANADA!!!

Canada to file Arctic seafloor claim this week

TODAY’S VOLLEY IN THE PHONY WAR ON CHRISTMAS:

Target Canada will not be playing Christmas music

FREE THE WEED:

3 More Michigan Cities Free Up Marijuana

Why Canada banned pot (science had nothing to do with it)

These days some think a total repeal of Canada’s drug laws is inevitable.
We look at how the drug laws put in 90 years ago were based on panic
and racism as opposed to science or medicine

Doob??? Really???

QUOTE: “One has to ask in these circumstances what the benefit to society is,” says University of Toronto criminologist Anthony Doob. Forty years ago, the Le Dain report also questioned the notion that overly harsh laws were harmless if not strictly enforced. Aside from the occasional outlandishly severe sentence, rational people lose respect for laws that are irrational, corroding the faith that citizens — especially young people — ought to place in institutions.

Prohibition Then and Now
A Not Now Silly investigative report

FREE THE CRACK:

Mayor Ford draws a crowd at Bills game

Rob Ford to start YouTube show: Why it won’t work

NATURE IS COMPLICATED:

Tool use in crocodylians: crocodiles and alligators
use sticks as lures to attract waterbirds

10 Mysteries we’ve solved in the past year…

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:

Tucker Carlson Backs Lara Logan on Benghazi:
‘Sometimes the Best Stories Have Flaky Sources’

IRONY ALERT!!!

QUOTE: “Yeah, well, you know as well as I, some of the best stories have flaky sources unfortunately,” Carlson concluded.

Before Kurtz was hired by Fox News earlier this year, he had blasted Carlson’s the Daily Caller website after a Dominican law enforcement official claimed that the publication had offered to pay prostitutes to make false claims about Sen. Bob Menendez (D-NJ).

Kurtz, a CNN host at the time, insisted that the Daily Caller “owes the senators and its readers an apology.”

MORE DISPATCHES FROM DETROIT, ‘MERKA’S FIRST THROWAWAY CITY:

Social media are a tool for Detroit Police
to answer critics, expand investigations

Enjoy Detroit TV Nostalgia? Catch ‘Remember When’ On WTVS Monday

BULLY CORNER:

Father Of Girl Who Committed Suicide Speaks
Out Against Ginger Bullying, ‘Kick A Ginger Day’

Science Reporter Emily Graslie Reads
Her Mail — And It’s Not So Nice

The Mark Koldys-Johnny Dollar Cyber-Bully Comments of the Day
Another Not Now Silly investagative report

IN SOUTH FLOR-I-DUH NEWS:

Miami readies its new front porch: the $131 million Perez Art Museum

Sweetwater mayor’s corruption conviction pops lid on a sewer of scandal

SCIENCE CORNER:

Chinese Train that Never Stops

VIDEO DU JOUR:


Memories of You is my favourite song and Eubie Blake among my favourite artists
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Headlines Du Jour ► Sunday, December 1, 2013

It’s that time of the morning again. As people begin to wake from their slumber, the Not Now Silly news team has been busy all night long. It has been gathering only the finest, shiniest, and most interesting Headlines Du Jour for your reading pleasure.

BEST HEADLINE DU JOUR:

Tennessee man shoots and kills wife
after argument over dead man’s shoes

►►► R.I.P. ◄◄◄


‘Fast & Furious’ star Paul
Walker killed in car crash

SO GLAD WE’RE LIVING IN A POST RACIAL SOCIETY:

Filmmaker Uncovers Her Family’s Shocking Slave-Trading History

Anti-LGBT cardinal: Catholic church isn’t anti-gay
and was ‘out-marketed’ on same sex marriage

Scott Jones attack inspires Don’t be Afraid campaign
Facebook group tries to fight homophobia

GOBBLE, GOBBLE:

Conservatives Still Seeking
Vindication for George W.
Bush Fake Turkey Scandal

OH!! CANADA!!!

Feds to monitor social
media round-the-clock

Online dating relationship ends badly, $1.3M later
Canadians looking for love online are falling prey to the country’s
most lucrative scam. One woman says she gave a total of $1.3
million to a man she met on a dating site, but never in person.

CRACK MAYOR CORNER:

Rob Ford and Doug Ford plan comeback on YouTube
Having lost their weekly radio talk show, the Fords are planning to launch a self-
produced program. “We’ve done a lot more than the Kardashians,” said Doug Ford.

FOX NEWS IN THE NEWS:

Murdoch’s British Tabloid Attempted Hundreds Of
Times To Hack Aides To British Royals’ Phones

CONSTITUTIONALLY YOURS:

Washington Post Op-Ed Goes Viral: End Presidential Term Limits

MUSIC VIDEO DU JOUR:

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Headlines Du Jour ► Saturday, November 30, 2013

The Not Now Silly news team never sleeps!!! While you were geting your 40 winks, they were creeping and crawling through the internets, filling their buckets with only the best in Headlines Du Jour for your Saturday.

JUST BECAUSE THE MSM HAS FORGOTTEN:

Orphans in Philippines Speak
of Typhoon’s Horrors

BLACK FRIDAY IS THE NEW BLACK FRIDAY:


110+ People Arrested As Nationwide
Protest Against Walmart Grows Stronger

Walmart on Black Friday: Scenes from the apocalypse

Senators blast Wal-Mart “trampling” workers’ rights
as dozens of activists are arrested on Black Friday

“It is time that Walmart pays its workers a fair wage and
stops trampling on their rights,” say Sherrod Brown et al

WHERE DO THOSE CHEAP GOODS COME FROM?

I Tried to See Where My T-Shirt Was Made,
and the Factory Sent Thugs After Me

CONSTITUTIONALLY YOURS:

The Supreme Court Could Rule that Hobby
Lobby is More of a Person than You Are

THERE IS STILL SO MUCH WORK TO BE DONE:

Adolescent AIDS rates up alarmingly, UN finds
But mother-to-child transmission of HIV has been dramatically reduced, UNICEF reports

CRACK CORNER:

Toronto Mayor Rob Ford could be denied entry to U.S.
Toronto Mayor Rob Ford says he wants to attend the NHL Winter Classic hockey game near Detroit. He may not get past Windsor.

CRACKED CORNER:

Birther preacher claims Obama had mother of his ‘love child’ killed outside White House

CRACKER CORNER:

North Dakota white supremacist hospitalized after hunger strike

CANADIAN CORNER:

Harper’s hockey book includes thanks to Nigel Wright for ethics help

SO GLAD WE’RE LIVING IN A POST-RACIAL SOCIETY:

A Bullet
On November 4, 2008, Barack Obama, America’s first African-American Presidential nominee, won the Presidency of the United States of America. This week, two weeks following that historic event, marks the fifth anniversary of when a racist put a bullet through the front window of my home.

FROM THE WAYBACK MACHINE:

Jerry Lewis’s Immortal Lip-Sync to a Trombone
Lewis’s clever pantomime from The Errand Boy has lived on in
Family Guy spoofs and fan-made YouTube reenactments 52 years later.

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly,
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Headlines Du Jour ► Friday, November 29, 2013

While you were lolling around in your tryptophan-induced stupour the Not Now Silly news team was busy — as busy as it has ever been. They were busy creeping and crawling through the innertubes with just one task: Bring back only the most scrumptious Headlines Du Jour.

TODAY IN LGBT NEWS:

Dinesh Bhugra: Psychiatry needs a broader focus
The
first gay president of the World Psychiatric Association wants a
radical rethink of mental
illness and for the profession to apologise
for the harm it has inflicted on gay people and women

World’s top psychiatrist comes out, promises stand on ‘gay cures’
New
head of World Psychiatric Association has come out as gay, demanded

action in countries where homosexuality is treated as an illness


FOX NEWS IN THE NEWS:

This Fox News interview with Richard Simmons
is the greatest thing to ever happen on cable TV

WRITERS CORNER:

Unpublished J.D. Salinger stories ‘leaked’ online
‘The Ocean Full of Bowling Balls,’ ‘Paula’ and
‘Birthday Boy’ surface against the late author’s wishes.

Unpacking the Writer – Continued

Farce Au Pain ► The Soft Launch

Farce au Pain © 2013, Headly Westerfield

YOU DON’T NEED A WEATHERMAN TO KNOW WHICH WAY THE WIND BLOWS:

Cape Breton amateur weather man is a viral video star

FREE THE WEED:

Pot-smoking Mountie can’t smoke in uniform, RCMP says
Cpl. Ron Francis legally smokes marijuana daily
while on duty to treat post-traumatic stress disorder

CRACK CORNER:

‘Merka’s greatest documentarian, Ken Burns, tackles the Rob Ford Story

FROM OUTER SPACE:

Did comet ISON flame out on its trip around the sun?

Comet ISON leaves a mystery behind as it goes around the sun

A Timeline Of Comet ISON’s Dangerous Journey

VIDEO DU JOUR:

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly,
home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic. Updated through the day. Use
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Headlines Du Jour ► Thanksgiving Day!!! ► Thursday, November 28, 2013

On this very special day the entire Not Now Silly News Team is grateful for all the headlines out there and for all our readers in here. We couldn’t — wouldn’t — do it without you. Here’s is today’s exciting holiday edition of Headlines Du Jour.

SO THANKFUL WE’RE LIVING IN A POST-RACIAL SOCIETY:

Residents shocked that DeKalb County,
Georgia, juror form lists ‘slave’ as occupation

Manitoba restaurant owner says she’s closing because of racism

ANOTHER DISPATCH FROM DETROIT, ‘MERKA’S FIRST THROWAWAY CITY:

Stephen Henderson: Rally around Kevyn Orr to hold off Detroit’s financial buzzards

Tom Walsh: Warren Buffett gets it – Detroit is still alive and kicking

AND IN WORLD NEWS:

Israel heads for a terrifying split

FREE THE WEED:

Members Of Congress To California U.S.
Attorney: Back Off Marijuana Prosecutions

MANNA FROM HEAVEN:

Pot Falls From the Sky in San Diego

SPEAKING OF RELIGION:

The Unfair Tax Exemption for Politically Active Churches Must End

No, Obama Is Not Closing The Vatican Embassy

VOTER RESTRICTION NEWS:

Some Florida Election Supervisors Stunned By New Voter Restrictions

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:

Fox Business host Stuart Varney lectures Pope Francis about capitalism and religion

Greta Van Susteren Hypes Phony Postal Service War On Christmas

Fox Nation vs. Reality: The U.S. Closes Imaginary Vatican City Embassy

10 Headlines Fox News Might Have Written Had
They Existed During Key Points in U.S. History

CRACK CORNER:

Rob Ford investigation: Judge orders release of censored parts of police document
Remaining blacked-out information about the mayor and his associates could be made public Dec. 6, under a ruling by Superior Court Justice Ian Nordheimer.

VIDEO DU JOUR:

Watch EmTV, my growing YouTube Channel

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly.,
home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic. Updated through the day. Use
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Headlines Du Jour ► Wednesday, November 27, 2013

While the rest of the world rests, the Not Now Silly news team is not allowed any sleep. Provisioned for the job at hand the NNS news team enters the internet through a coaxial cable in NNS Headquarters and collects as many headlines as they can safely carry. Then they bring them back where they are compiled into today’s Headlines Du Jour

CONSTITUTIONALLY YOURS:

Supreme Court takes up birth control cases

Obama administration proposes new limits on tax-exempt political groups

IN LGBT NEWS:

Judge orders expedited marriage license
so terminally ill woman can wed partner

SO GLAD WE ARE LIVING IN A POST-RACIAL SOCIETY:

Florida Christian School Threatens to Kick
Out Black Girl Over Her Natural Hair

Prosecutors Say This Ohio Man Plotted
A One-Man Racist Killing Spree

Where Do the Most Racist and Homophobic
People In America Live? Check This Map

GOD BLESS ‘MERKA:

America is the Stingiest Rich Country in the World

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:

Fox News: Now the Anti-Obamacare Propaganda Channel

O’Reilly Factor’s Watters Takes on Rob
Ford: ‘Are You Having Fun Right Now?’

O’Reilly Factor is Rob Ford’s craziest interview yet

MORE DISPATCHED FROM DETROIT, ‘MERKA’S FIRST THROWAWAY CITY:

Detroit bankruptcy creditors ask judge to
take steps toward sale of DIA treasures

This Is What Detroit Could Look Like In 2033 … And Beyond

CRACK CORNER:

“This isn’t Toronto,” says sheriff after arresting Florida mayor
Oh brother, now small town sheriffs are using our mayor as an example

RELIGION CORNER:


 

Pope Francis rips capitalism and trickle-down
economics to shreds in new policy statement

Dan Savage Was Last Straw — Catholic Group
Demands Bill Maher’s HBO Show Gets Canceled

IN OUTER SPACE:

Birth of black hole witnessed, marking watershed moment for astronomy

Mach 1,000 shock wave lights supernova remnant
Astronomers have discovered that a reverse shock wave racing inward
heats Tycho’s supernova remnant and causes it to emit X-ray light.

VIDEO DU JOUR:

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly.,
home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic. Updated through the day. Use
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Headlines Du Jour ► Thursday, November 21, 2013

Overnight, while you were sleeping, the Not Now Silly interns went into the back alleys and speakeasies of the urban internet. Meanwhile, trained coyotes swept the rural precincts. The task: Come back with today’s Headlines Du Jour, or don’t come back at all. We now have openings for new interns. Meanwhile, here are the headlines.

TODAY IN WINGNUTTIA:

► Clearly I’m going to hell . . . Twice ◄

TODAY IN FOX “NEWS” NEWS:


► They can’t claim him, so they’ll dis his party instead ◄

TODAY’S EXCITING EPISODES OF COPS GONE WILD:

A sociologist interrogates the criminal-justice system, and tries to stay out of the spotlight.

As part of the Global War on Terror, the US has exported its border patrol model to the Caribbean.

TODAY IN FLOR-I-DUH NEWS:

CANADIAN DRUG CORNER:


► You can’t make this shit up ►

CANADIAN BULLY CORNER:

SPHINCTER DU JOUR:

NEWS FROM OUTER SPACE:

Once in a lifetime galactic fireworks display due from Comet Ison
Comet Ison, first spotted a year ago, is now visible to the naked
eye and will continue to brighten as it hurtles toward the sun

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Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly., home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic. Updated through the day. Use our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open thread.

Headlines Du Jour ► Wednesday, November 20, 2013

While you were lazy and sleeping the Not Now Silly news team has been creeping and crawling through the vast recesses of cyberspace — much like Ashley Graham and the Flying Monkey Squad — to bring back nothing but the best in Headlines Du Jour. Here is today’s catch:

BEST IDEA DU JOUR:

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:


Fox Business host wonders if women have weird
brains that are keeping them down in the tech industry

There aren’t many women CEOs in Silicon Valley, perhaps
because their brains are broken, posits one pundit

TODAY IN THE WAR ON DRUGS:

Kansas Couple Sues Sheriff for $7 Million Over Unconstitutional Raid

SPHINCTER OF THE WEEK:

Hawaii lawmaker ‘solves’ homeless problem
by destroying their stuff with a sledgehammer

VAGINA OF THE WEEK:

Sarah Silverman to MSNBC: ‘I Think Vaginas Really, Really Scare People.’

FAUX OUTRAGE OF THE DAY:

Obama Omits ‘Under God’ From Gettysburg Address; Outrage Ensues

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS: 

Iowa man’s gun accidentally fires from pants
pocket at Wal-Mart but he finishes shopping

TODAY IN WTF? NEWS:

Don’t Miss Catch an Illegal Immigrant Day Today

► OOOOPS! CATCH AN ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT DAY CANCELLED ◄

UT Young Conservatives call off ‘catch an illegal immigrant’ stunt

BULLY CORNER:

Gay Ontario jail guard Bob Ranger suffered poisoned workplace
Gay Ontario correctional officer Bob Ranger endured a “poisoned” workplace
and won the largest grievance board settlement to date. It’s not enough.

Mark Koldys, before he turned evil

► BULLYING FROM THE NOT NOW SILLY ARCHIVES ◄
The Mark Koldys-Johnny Dollar
Cyber-Bully Comments of the Day

CRACK CORNER:

Rob Ford says he’s quit drinking,
has had ‘come-to-Jesus’ moment

CBC interview comes after council
votes to restrict Toronto mayor’s budget

► Editorial from The Toronto Sun ◄
Rob Ford’s ‘crazy train’ runs amok

► From Bloomberg News ◄
Why Rob Ford Happened

► From Time Magazine ◄
Toronto Mayor Leaves ‘Today Show’ Hosts ‘Speechless’
Rob Ford on crack-smoking video: ‘I can’t remember it. I was very, very inebriated’

VIDEO DU JOUR:

► Who knew this was so difficult? ◄

Headlines Du Jour
is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly., home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic. Updated through the day.
Use our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open
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Headlines Du Jour ► Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Remember the good ol’ days, when the milkman and paperboy still delivered fresh products every morning?  Not Not Silly takes you back to the days of yore. Our interns have been set loose on the internet and told not to return without interesting Headlines Du Jour. Let’s take a look at what they found this morning.

WHAT A GREAT IDEA:

SCOTT WALKER IS SURROUNDED:

TODAY IN EDUCATION:

STILL FIGHTING WORLD WAR TWO:

TODAY IN LGBT NEWS:


►►► R.I.P. ◄◄◄

ANOTHER DISPATCH FROM DETROIT, ‘MERKA’S FIRST THROWAWAY CITY:

FREE THE WEED:

CRACK CORNER:


Law-and-order Conservatives offer only hugs for Rob Ford: Tim Harper

Reporter’s notebook:
In the heart of Ford Nation with Toronto’s embattled mayor

Rob Ford’s misadventures have Austin raising
concerns about alliance with Toronto

Just six weeks ago, Mayor Rob Ford was touting music alliance with Austin.
But now Texas officials expressed concerns given mayor’s recent bombshells.

CRACKED CORNER:

Headlines Du Jour
is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly., home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic. Updated through the day.
Use our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open
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Headlines Du Jour ► Monday, November 18, 2013

Another work week begins and the Not Now Silly army of interns have just returned with all the latest Headlines Du Jour for your reading pleasure.

FLOODING IN THE ARABIAN DESERT:

Saudi capital hit with rare floods, residents urged to stay indoors

Crazy Photos Are Coming Out Of Saudi
Arabia After Rain Leaves Capital Flooded

FLOODING IN BOSTON STRONG:

FEMA’s new flood map reaches deep into city

MORE DISPATCHES FROM DETROIT, ‘MERKA’S FIRST THROWAWAY CITY:

Why Detroit’s lights went out, and how the city plans to get them back on

Finley: Will downtown Detroit be a white enclave?

IN LGBT NEWS:

Liz Cheney shrugs off lesbian sister’s call marriage rights: ‘We disagree’

Mary Cheney Fires Back at Sister’s Anti-Gay Marriage Comments (Again)

TODAY’S FOX “NEWS” LIE:

Fox Politicizes The Kennedy Assassination:
JFK Was A Conservative Murdered By A Liberal

Fox News marks 50th anniversary of JFK’s
death by painting him as ‘quite conservative’

 

SO GLAD WE ARE LIVING IN A POST RACIAL SOCIETY:

Cobb taken into custody for toting guns in Leith

Craig Cobb: White supremacist told he is 14% African in televised DNA test

 

► VIDEO BONUS ◄

 

 



America’s angriest white men: Up close
with racism, rage and Southern supremacy

Up close with small-town white rage, with bitter, scary men
who feel left behind by economic and cultural change

Chad Palmer, Georgia Deputy Sheriff, Suspended
After Dressing In Blackface With Inmate Stripes

WAIT!!! WHAT???

Company fines couple $3.5k for posting negative review

Overboard cases on cruise lines often under-reported to public

HISTORY IS COMPLICATED/IT WAS 50 YEARS AGO:


 

In A Prophetic Letter, A Dallas Citizen Begged JFK Not To Visit

Stabilized Footage of the JFK Assassination Is Unsettlingly Real

► VIDEO BONUS ◄

 

ANOTHER NEIGHBOUR FROM HELL:

San Pedro Man Catches Neighbor Having Sex With His Dog

BOOK CORNER:

The Miami Book Fair International celebrates
its 30th anniversary when it opens on Sunday

TODAY IN GOD:

Gospel of selfishness pervades American Christianity
The philosophers of greed now use Christianity as their cover story

TODAY IN SCIENCE:

Sun will ‘flip upside down’ within weeks, says NASA

CRACK CORNER:

Rob Ford speaks to Fox News
Ford opens up to John Roberts from Fox News

Rob Ford might seek injunction to stop council meeting: Lawyer
Mayor Rob Ford consults lawyer George Rust D’Eye over council’s plan to transfer his powers and budget to deputy mayor Norm Kelly.

Ford his own worst enemy
Toronto’s mayor has only himself to blame for his political destruction

DISCRIMINATION DU JOUR:

For many Roma in Western Europe, no option to ‘go home’

VIDEO DU JOUR:

► Making M.C. Esher’s impossible objects possible ►

 

Headlines Du Jour
is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly., home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic. Updated through the day.
Use our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open
thread.