Tag Archives: Guns

Headlines Du Jour ► Thursday, January 9, 2014

Good morning, Headliners. It’s time once again to take the pulse of the world and see what your neighbours will be talking about later today. So grab a cup of java, put your cell phone on vibrate only, and settle in with today’s Headlines Du Jour.

BEST HEADLINE DU JOUR:

Oklahoma man killed
stepfather with ‘atomic
wedgie,’ authorities say

LGBT NEWS:

Breaking: Utah Gov. Tells 1360 Legally Married
Same-Sex Couples Their Unions Are Invalid

FROM OUTER SPACE:

UFO Causes German Airport To Divert Flights

Fox Guest: Minimum Wage Is Just ‘Black Teenage Unemployment Act’

‘Gates of Hell’: Fox News
Pairs Ann Coulter with
Unfortunate Chyron

Colbert Calls Out Fox’s Hollow Climate Change Attack

TODAY’S COLD CASE:

Burglars Who Took On F.B.I. Abandon Shadows

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

Lawmaker fires handgun in Kentucky Capitol: ‘I am a gun owner… It happens’

I NEVER META-DATA I DIDN’T LIKE:

Graphs by MIT Students Show the Enormously Intrusive Nature of Metadata

MORE DISPATCHES FROM DETROIT, ‘MERKA’S FIRST THROWAWAY CITY:

16 Reasons to Go to Detroit Right Now

Detroit’s historic Brush Park may finally see a revival

Rebuilding Detroit’s first and last neighborhood

Nod to 1300 Lafayette

WHEN DO WE ADMIT THAT CAPITALISM HAS NOT WORKED?

Bring Back the WPA

Why we should give free money to everyone

TODAY IN FLORI-DUH NEWS:

Florida man bites neighbor’s
ear off over a cigarette

Toxic Tush Doc Oneal Morris to Begin
Prison Sentence (in the Male Population)

CLIMATE CHANGE, GLOBAL WARMING, & CHARLETANS

Linking Weather Extremes to Global Warming

Yes, It’s Cold — and Yes, Global
Warming Is Still Happening

RELIGION CORNER:

Pat Robertson: Global warming is a scam because there are no SUVs on Jupiter

America’s First ‘Pastafarian’
Official Sworn into Office

Pastafarian minister sworn into office

FREE THE WEED!!!

Fox News contributor Ben Carson: Marijuana causes flashbacks years after use

Chris Hayes: Bill O’Reilly Wrong On Pot Arrests

Jon Stewart blasts cable anchors panicking over legal pot: ‘You’re a f*cking idiot’

O’Reilly Fires Back at Jon Stewart, ‘Can’t Imagine’ Chinese Kids Being Addicted to Texting

Kevin Hart and Ice Cube Aggressively
Mock Nancy Grace’s Anti-Weed Comments

VIDEO DU JOUR:

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Headlines Du Jour ► Monday, January 6, 2014

The Not Now Silly headline-collecting robot drones have been behaving oddly lately. While they have no heads, it sure seems like they are putting them together. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say they were talking about me. 

Let’s get right to today’s Headlines Du Jour.

HISTORY IS COMPLICATED:

How two archaeologists’ hunch led to
stunning claim about Buddha’s birth date

LGBT NEWS:

Gay Marriage Opponents Call For Uprising In Utah

TODAY IN CLIMATE CHANGE:

“Dark Money” Funds Climate Change Denial Effort
A Drexel University study finds that a large slice of donations to
organizations that deny global warming are funneled through third-
party pass-through organizations that conceal the original funder

FREE THE WEED!!!

The People of Florida
Demand Medical Marijuana

And they’re forcing a ballot measure
to legalize it in November.

Obama’s Pot Problem

Now that states have started legalizing recreational marijuana,
will the president continue the government’s war on weed?

Bummer: Colorado pot shops will run out of marijuana within days

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:

Fox News Sunday Guest: God Doesn’t
Want Nuns To Sign ObamaCare Waiver

Things Go Horribly Wrong For Fox News When
They Try to Use Mitt Romney to Smear MSNBC

THE “O” IN GOP STANDS FOR OLD:

A more progressive America is emerging, but Republicans won’t go down without a fight

Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker doesn’t know
how to make Republicans more appealing

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

Fate of Fired Guns & Ammo Editor Shows
‘Little Room for Nuance’ in ‘Gun Journalism’

OH, CANADA!!!

Canadian libricide: Tories torch and dump centuries
of priceless, irreplaceable environmental archives

ANOTHER HOAX THAT’S GONE VIRAL:

Was a Local Fox Reporter Really Fired For
Saying On-Air He’d ‘F*ck’ Missing Woman?

WHAT IF THEY BECOME SELF-AWARE?

AI vs. AI:
Two chatbots talking to each other

TODAY IN RELIGION:

Christian Pastor Calls For Atheists And Gays To Be Put To Death

10 Worst Sex and Relationship Tips From the Christian Right
These holy tips on love, dating and marriage
will allow you to please yourself (not
that way), your mate and your Lord.

IS JUSTICE BLIND?

Trial by Twitter
After high-school football stars were accused of rape,
online vigilantes demanded that justice be served. Was it?

TODAY IN FLOR-I-DUH NEWS:

Miami Named One of America’s Ten Best Cities for 2013

IN OUTER SPACE:

Small Asteroid 2014 AA Hits Earth
Discovered on New Year’s Eve by a telescope in Arizona, a small asteroid struck Earth somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean — apparently unnoticed — about 25 hours later.

MEET THE BEATLES:

50 Years Later: The Greatest Beatles Performance of All Time
Months before the The Ed Sullivan Show, the band played a seven-song set for Swedish radio that settles any doubt about their electrifying live presence.

VIDEO DU JOUR:

◄ A Beatles’ Bootleg – Something ►

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Headlines Du Jour ► New Year’s Day 2014

2013 YEAR-ENDERS

Twelve Months Of Fox
News Race-Baiting

2013 a great year for U.S. stocks

2013: The year in whiteness

2013: The Best of Bad Astronomy

The Year in Racial Amnesia

Universe Today’s Top 10
(or so) Stories of 2013

2013 In Memoriam:
Musicians We Lost This Year

The 20 Worst Fox News
Moments Of 2013

The Seven Most Tiresome
Media Trends of 2013

In 1964, Isaac Asimov
Imagined the World in 2014

I’m sure it comes as no shock to anyone, but it’s a brand NEW YEAR!!! 

Not Now Silly is going to call it Two-thousand and fourteen when frustrated with it, but ’14 when pleased.

Let’s get right to today’s Headlines Du Jour, the very first of ’14.

CONSTITUTIONALLY YOURS:

Life, Liberty, and the Founding Fathers’ Pursuit of Hoppiness
The Constitution was written by men who owned breweries, imported whiskey, and humped cows.

Retired General Wants March on White House and Citizens Arrest of Obama

Dysfunctional Republican Christians Vow To Destroy the First Amendment

THE “O” IN GOP STANDS FOR OLD:

Oops! Republican Congressman Files Re-Election Papers For Wrong District

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

Christie declines to defend N.J. gun laws, sparking criticism

SO GLAD WE’RE LIVING IN A POST-RACIAL SOCIETY:

Knoxville drivers greeted by banners warning
that diversity is anti-white genocide

TODAY IN FLOR-I-DUH NEWS:

Judge strikes down Florida law mandating drug tests for welfare

OH! OH!! CANADA!!!

Passengers Ridicule Canadian
Airline For Sexist Ticket Policy

RELIGION CORNER:

Franklin Graham: Pope Francis is not the judge, God is the judge

Home Depot founder worries Pope Francis neither loves nor understands rich Americans

HIGH TECH CRIME:

Thieves In Europe Are Using USB Sticks To Clean Out ATMs

VIDEO DU JOUR:

◄ Best News Bloopers of 2013 ►

Headlines
Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of Not Now Silly, home of the
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Headlines Du Jour ► Tuesday, December 31, 2013

This being the last day of the year means that today’s Headlines Du Jour is the last one for 2013. Join us tomorrow for the first Headlines Du Jour of 2014. Two-thousand and four. It just rolls off the tongue.

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:

Fox Anchor: NY Times Benghazi Report ‘Goes Against Much of Fox News’ Own Reporting’

Fox News Wastes No
Time Attacking NY Times
Benghazi Report

TRUE STORY: THE “O” IN GOP STANDS FOR OLD:

Guess which party has a bone to pick with evolution?

Sen. Ted Cruz hires lawyers to renounce his Canadian citizenship

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

Guy Reaches For Wallet, Ends Up
Shooting Himself In The Butt

RELIGION CORNER:

Comedian Raised $125K for Atheist Tornado Survivor Just to Piss Off Her ‘Okie-Christian Neighbors’

IN OUTER SPACE:

Sun has ‘flipped upside down’ – Nasa

The Quadrantid Meteor Shower-One of the Best Bets for 2014

FREE THE WEED:

Tommy Chong on marijuana legalization:
Everyone is waking up to the truth

IN FLOR-I-DUH NEWS:

The 12 Craziest Things That
Happened in Florida in 2013

The 32nd Annual The King Mango Strut

WHEN GLITTER IS OUTLAWED, ONLY GLAM STARS WILL BE OUTLAWS:

U.S. police gone mad: Activists
arrested for ‘bioterrorism hoax’
for using glitter on a protest banner

MOTHER EARTH IS GONNA BE PISSED:

Scientists Find 7,300-Mile
Mercury Contamination ‘Bullseye’
Around Canadian Tar Sands

I HAVE AN ORIGINAL PETER MAX POSTER:

‘Antiques Roadshow’ discovers $660
painting is $661,000 van Dyck masterpiece

VIDEO DU JOUR:

Headlines
Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of Not Now Silly, home of the
Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic, and your rest stop on the Information
Highway. Use our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in
today’s open thread.

Headlines Du Jour ► Thursday, December 26, 2013

With baby Jesus’ birthday over, the world holds its collective breath until New Year’s Rockin’ Eve. Meanwhile, the new Not Now Silly headline robots are working out perfectly. No more work stoppages; no more complaints. So, get ready for today’s Headlines Du Jour. 

BEST HEADLINE DU JOUR:

Man charged with stealing handcuffs he
was wearing in escape from police cruiser

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

Father Shoots And Kills 14-Year-Old Daughter, Saying He Mistook Her For Burglar

QUACKER CORNER:

Duck Dynasty empire estimated to be worth $500 million U.S.

TODAY IN FLOR-I-DUH NEWS:

Officers’ sobriety stop yields more than beer
A routine traffic stop took a bizarre turn when the driver told law enforcement
officers, “I don’t want to freak you out, but I have someone in the trunk.”

FREE THE WEED!!!

Brown pardons mostly
target drug offenders

SCIENCE CORNER:

New artificial muscle
promises super strength

FROM OUTER SPACE:

NASA celebrates anniversary of the
most important photo ever taken

WAIT!!! WHAT???

Illinois man uses ‘Star Trek’ technology to defraud investors of $25 million

THE REASON FOR THE SEASON:

Girlfriend transports man shot in stolen Christmas
present dispute to hospital in stolen truck

VIDEO DU JOUR:

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of Not Now Silly, home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic, and your rest stop on the Information Highway. Use our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open thread.

Headlines Du Jour ► Sunday, December 22, 2013

Following yesterday’s insurrection by the Not Now Silly interns, let’s just say you’ll never see or hear from them again. A brand new team of interns were hired, trained, and sent out overnight to collect today’s Headlines Du Jour.

BEST HEADLINE DU JOUR:

Robot Handjobs Are The Future, And The Future Is Coming

LGBT NEWS:

LGBT activist reported missing

In Striking Down Utah’s Gay Marriage
Ban, Judge Gives Scalia Big Bear Hug

When Having Condoms Gets You Arrested

SO GLAD WE’RE LIVING IN A POST-RACIAL SOCIETY:

Wall Street Journal Op-Ed Bemoans The
End Of White Rule In The United States

Barry Diller’s PR Exec Fired After AIDS Tweet Outrage

CONSTITUTIONALLY YOURS:

Pennsylvania Supreme Court Says It’s Unconstitutional For Gas Companies
to Frack Wherever They Want

THE ROB FORD DEFENSE DIDN’T WORK FOR HIM:

General in Charge of U.S. Nukes Fired for Drunken Escapades in Russia

STING NOWHERE TO BE FOUND:

Message in a bottle found 54 years later in Canadian Arctic

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

Colorado school shooting plot by two
teenage students thwarted: cops

RELIGION CORNER:

Right-Wing Group Seeks Help Rewriting the Bible Because It’s Not Conservative Enough

VIDEO DU JOUR:

◄ ◄ ◄ I gotcher Rasta Christmas right here!!! ► ► ►

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of Not Now Silly,
home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic, and your rest stop on the Information Highway. Use
our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open
thread.

Headlines Du Jour ► Friday, December 20, 2013

With the year coming to an end, Not Now Silly will NOT be participating in any of those Best/Worst lists that plague most web sites at this time of year. No, the news team will continue to do what it does best: Collect headlines from all over the world and drop them here for your reading enjoyment.

IN LGBT NEWS:

New Mexico Becomes 17th State to Legalize Same-Sex Marriage

CRACK CORNER:

A Positive Step: Obama Commutes
Sentences for 8 Crack Cocaine Offenders

◄ ◄ ◄ AND, IT’S ALWAYS THE RIGHT SIZE AND COLOUR ► ► ►
Rob Ford, obviously: ‘Women love money. Give
‘em a couple thousand bucks and they are happy’

Bad Santa
The Ford family Christmas party was an insight into how the clan carries on and manages to live day-to-day with the darkness suppressed or ignored

QUACK CORNER:

◄ ◄ ◄ STICK A FORK IN IT, THIS GOOSE IS COOKED ► ► ►
Robertson Family Issues Statement
on Duck Dynasty’s Future on A&E

◄ ◄ ◄ EARLIER  ► ► ►
Sarah Palin and Bobby Jindal’s “Duck Dynasty” screeds twist the ConstitutionConservatives rally around suspended ‘Duck Dynasty’ star Phil RobertsonSarah Palin, NOM, And Westboro Baptist: Right Wing Furious Over Duck Dynasty Dad’s SuspensionGeraldo on Duck Dynasty Phil’s Suspension: ‘Political Correctness Has Gotten Malignant’Bobby ‘Stop being the stupid party’ Jindal defends Duck Dynasty star because Miley CyrusNewt Gingrich compares ‘Duck Dynasty’ star Phil Robertson to Pope FrancisPhil Robertson, Duck Dynasty and Why His Suspension Isn’t an Attack on Free Speech

SO GLAD WE’RE LIVING IN A POST-RACIAL SOCIETY:

School Named For Ku Klux Klan Leader
Nathan Bedford Forrest To Be Rebranded

Maryland KKK will meet in government
building to plot Obama’s impeachment

RUPERT MURDOCH’S PAPERS IN THE NEWS AGAIN:

Kate Middleton, Prince Harry Hacked By Murdoch Paper, Trial Confirms

The Sun Apologizes For Calling
Woman On Maternity Leave ‘Lazy’

RUPERT MURDOCH’S EMPLOYEES IN THE NEWS AGAIN:

Bill O’Reilly Warns That Rich People
Are ‘In Danger,’ Asks That You Pray

CONSTITUTIONALLY YOURS:

Federal Court Finds GOP Governor Violated Civil Rights Of Protesters

IN CANADIAN CONSTITUTIONAL COURTS:

Explainer: Top court to rule on the future of prostitution in Canada

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

Texas Gun Club grand opening goes wrong when employee shoots own hand

Deer Trail now scheduled to hold drone hunting vote in April

I GOTCHER PHONY WAR ON CHRISTMAS RIGHT HERE!

Fox News Airs ‘Happy Holidays’ Message As
Bill O’Reilly Declares Victory In War On Christmas

Florida Capitol approves Pastafarian Flying
Spaghetti Monster among holiday displays

 

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly,
home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic and your rest stop on the Information Highway. Use
our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open
thread.

Headlines Du Jour ► Thursday, December 19, 2013

Each morning I sit by the open window waiting. I wait for the return of the Not Now Silly interns, who are both the hunters and the gatherers of this operation. The NNS interns have spent the entire night reconnoitering the innertubes and foraging for nothing but the best and most succulent headlines. They are picked at the exact moment of ripeness and brought back to me for inspection. I take these proto-headlines, check them for bugs, put them through a patented homogenization process, and VOILA! Today’s Headlines Du Jour.

PUT THIS ON PAY-PER-VIEW SETTLE THE NATIONAL DEBT:

McCain To Reid: ‘I’m Going To Kick The Crap Out Of You’

PROLITARIAT OF THE WORLD UNITE:

The Great American Class War: Plutocracy Versus Democracy

I GOTCHER WAR ON CHRISTMAS RIGHT HERE:

Arizona Woman Gets Punched for Saying
‘Happy Holidays’ Instead of ‘Merry Christmas’

SAY! DIDN’T YOU USED TO BE…?

BBC interviews random man on the
street who turns out to be the Fonz

SCIENCE IS COMPLICATED:

Scientists cut million-year natural process to convert algae into crude oil to about an hour

Fossil turns back the human hands
of time  for tool use 500,000 years

LGBT NEWS:

Lawsuit: Mississippi school forced
‘pathetic dyke’ to use the boys’ bathroom

 

America’s Oldest Gay Rights Magazine Picks Pope Francis as Person of Year

 

◄ ◄ ◄ REMOVING THE ‘NASTY’ FROM DUCK DYNASTY ► ► ►

‘Duck Dynasty’s’ Phil Robertson suspended for comments about gays

◄ ◄ ◄ EARLIER ► ► ►

‘Duck Dynasty’ Star Rants Against ‘Homosexual
Behavior,’ ‘Islamists,’ And ‘Shintos’ In Epic Interview

Duck Dynasty Dad: Growing Up In Louisiana ‘I
Never Saw The Mistreatment Of Any Black Person’

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

Gun activists have a new craze —
and it’s more dangerous than you think

The new front line in the battle over gun rights is “open carry.” Here’s why it has psychologists deeply concerned

HYPOCRITE CORNER:

Watch: Marco Rubio is Confronted for Accepting $10k Obamacare Subsidy

 

Johnny Dollar ► Hypocrite ► UPDATED!

CRACK MAYOR CORNER:

Reporter Daniel Dale drops libel suit
after Mayor Rob Ford apologizes again

Dale has agreed to not continue his lawsuit against the mayor after
a second, more complete, public apology was issued Wednesday.

TODAY’S EXCITING EPISODE OF COPS GONE WILD:

N.Y. cop’s anti-Obama Facebook rant: ‘Go die in a shallow grave you Muslim commie’

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:

‘Where’s Hoda?!’ Shep Smith Gets Hilariously
Distracted by Dana Perino’s Facebook Page

THAT’LL TEACH HIM!!!

German town revokes Hitler’s citizenship

LOVE CONQUERS ALL:

Jamaican bride dumps new husband 20 MINUTES after
arriving in the UK… and guess who paid for her £5k visa

PLATE TECHTONICS IS COMPLICATED:

The world’s newest island, Niijima

VIDEO DU JOUR:

THIS REALLY SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN 3D:

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly,
home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic and your rest stop on the Information Highway. Use
our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open
thread.

Headlines Du Jour ► Saturday, December 14, 2013

Good morning, sleepyheads! As you were getting your shut-eye, the Not Now Silly news team spread out in the less- populated precincts of the innertubes, gathering only the most succulent headlines for your reading enjoyment. Let’s get right to it.

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:

SPEAKING OF JESUS:

Brutal offshore Christian reform school exposed in new documentary

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

DIDJA FALL IN?

SCIENCE IS COMPLICATED:

THE PLANET IS COMPLICATED:

CRACK MAYOR CORNER:

The mayor has admitted to drug use, and there’s
evidence of other troubling behaviour like
driving drunk. Is this a case for Children’s Aid?

NEWS YOU CAN USE:

RELIGION CORNER:

VIDEO DU JOUR:

 An EmTV Production

 

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly,
home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic and your rest stop on the Information Highway. Use
our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open
thread.

Headlines Du Jour ► Wednesday, December 11, 2013

The daily collecting of Headlines Du Jour is a tricky thing. Not Now Silly sends its interns and parolees out into the innertubes, each provisioned with scissors and a wicker basket. They carefully cut out the headlines and place them respectfully into the basket. Only when their basket is full are they allowed to return for food and water. Now that we’ve cleared that up, let’s get right to today’s Headlines Du Jour.

STOP THE INSANITY:

GUNS, GUNS, GUNS:

At Least 194 Children Have Been Shot to Death Since Newtown.

Police: Three Year-Old Shot Himself In The
Head After Parents Left Gun On Kitchen Counter

6 police officers injured, 2 suspects killed in shootings

SO GLAD WE’RE LIVING IN A POST-RACIAL SOCIETY:

NAACP calls for probe of ‘harassment’
by Miami Gardens police

IN LBGT NEWS:

9 Stupid Myths About Bisexuals
That Will Make You Laugh

TRUE STORY: THE “O” IN GOP STANDS FOR OLD!

Republican Candidate Says You Have to
Talk to Women on an Emotional Level

John McCain reacts to Obama’s Castro
handshake: ‘Chamberlain shook hands with Hitler’

North Carolina Republican’s DWI and drug
possession arrest is his fourth in office

TODAY IN GOD:

Fischer: Pot Should Be
Illegal Because Its Use
Violates Biblical Teaching

Creationist home school curriculum isn’t just inaccurate — it’s really, really dumb

What the New Atheists Get Very Wrong About Religion

I GOTCHER WAR ON CHRISTMAS RIGHT HERE:

Police Called To Home To Break Up Family
Fight Over Decorating Of Christmas Tree

Fox News host flips over atheist holiday display:
‘Baby Jesus is behind the Festivus pole!’

FOX “NEWS” IN THE NEWS:

Fox News Wonders If
Castro Friend Nelson
Mandela Would Have Hated
Obama’s Castro Handshake

Megyn Kelly to Leno:
Ask Karl Rove if I’m
‘This Conservative Operative’

Anti-LGBT baker tells Fox News that Jesus ‘wants me’ to deny cakes to gay couples

Fox Allows Anti-Obamacare Guest To Hide Koch Funding

Elisabeth Hasslebeck Endorses Anti-Gay Discrimination
Because Religious Freedom And Free Enterprise!

LOOFAH LAD IN THE NEWS:

O’Reilly Goes Ballistic Over Denver Post Hiring Pot Editor: They’re ‘Promoting Intoxication!’

Bill O’Reilly Freaks Out
About Denver Post Pot Editor

THE FALAFEL KING SAYS:

O’Reilly to Rove: GOP Lacks Real Leader,
Any Strong Alternative to Obamacare

CRACK MAYOR CORNER:

Rob Ford should apologize to
Star reporter, says deputy

Rob Ford suggests Bill Blair’s investigation of him was retribution for proposed budget cuts

Conrad Black out-Mansbridges Mansbridge

Rob Ford, Conrad Black and the death of decency

Rob Ford saga biggest Canadian story in U.S. this century

SCIENCE CORNER:

Simulations back up theory that Universe is a hologram
A ten-dimensional theory of gravity makes the same predictions as standard quantum physics in fewer dimensions.

 

Headlines Du Jour is a leisure-time activity of National Trufax, a wholly owned and operated subsidiary of Not Now Silly,
home of the Steam-Powered Word-0-Matic and your rest stop on the Information Highway. Use
our valuable bandwidth to post your news comments in today’s open
thread.