Tag Archives: Politics

The Fox “News” Spin Cycle ► Episode Nine

Bizarro is owned by DC Comics

When the history of this election cycle is written (sadly both Theodore H. White and Hunter S. Thompson are no longer with us) an entire chapter will have to be devoted to the Fox “News” Spin Cycle, which has been spinning more furiously than Hurricane Isaac in the Gulf of Mexico. Fox “News” is forced to SPIN furiously in order to WHITEwash for the Republican team of Mendacious Mitt and Lyin’ Ryan, who have still not caught fire with ‘Merkin population.

The Fox “News” coverage of the GOP national convention has been one entire Republicapaloosa, when it hasn’t been attacking the President of the United States with false and already discredited talking points. Clearly the Fair & Balanced network ain’t.

Meanwhile, there’s an entire new episode of the Fox “News” Spin Cycle to deconstruct, so let’s get going. It’s a little longer than usual since it’s been almost a day and a half since the last one.

Wretched Gretched should get that capitalization problem looked into.

Just another example of how Wretched Gretched, or an intern acting on her
behalf, makes herself look stooopud. Capital letters are your friend, Gretch!

A hagiographer at work.

STOP THE PRESSES!!! Bully Boy Bolling is going to the RNC in Tampa!!! The trip won’t go smoothly. Read on.

Wait!!! What??? She found the SHIFT key! too bad she used it on the wrong word, but it’s a start.

Lots of people have unloaded on Mendacious Mitt Romney, but you’ll only see them on Fox “News” to be criticized.

Of course it’s not a War on Women. It’s a War on Women’s Rights. Why can’t the Left Wing see that?

His father also released 12-years of tax returns and honestly said that he had been brainwashed by the generals
during the Vietnam War. What Mendacious Mitt took away from that: Never tell the truth, so he hasn’t, ever!

Because Condé Nast Traveler Magazine is clearly in the tank for the Secretary of State.

Delta doesn’t control the weather, Bully Boy Bolling. President Obama does. Or don’t you listen to Rush Limbaugh?

A minute-by-minute update from Bully Boy Bolling. Soon he’ll start telling us of his bowel movements.

I will provided you finally reveal that you are spending untold millions to influence the same election
for which you and Fox “News” are trying to pretend you are just providing honest punditry. Deal?

Sheriff Joe is being investigated and prosecuted by the Federal government, but the only
time you’ll hear that on Fox “News” is when they use it to criticize President Obama.

Bully Boy Bolling seems to have a need to be in every picture. Here he is, finally in the air on the way to Tampa.

Bully Boy Bolling with Wretched Gretched.

Bully Boy Bolling with Buddy Christ’s younger brother.

Bully Boy Bolling with his sycophantic co-hosts from The Five.

That’s not EXACTLY what the NYT said, but I’m sure that wouldn’t surprise you.

Bully Boy Bolling makes a funny about a competitor.

Bully Boy Bolling makes another funny about a competitor.

Bully Boy Bolling makes a funny about  . . . WAIT! That wasn’t
even funny. Is that a Pop Cultural reference to a bad ’90s sitcom?

Crosshairs? We’re not going there again, are we?

I’d start with Ann Romney’s speech, but what do I know? I just don’t like Stepford Wives.

Told you so!!! Bully Boy Bolling just shit himself!!!

Shorter Baier: We’ll be lying our asses off.

Here’s the panel lying their asses off.

Hear them lie their asses off.

The one who spends the most money to influence the race. Come on down, KKKarl Rove!!!

Ask them how that blind trust found them to invest in their business.

Ask them if they THINK capitalization of their name is OPTIONAL.

How many times are you going to promote this interview? Wait!!! What??? You capitalized all
the right words on that last one. Who are you and what have you done with Wretched Gretched?

Never mind!!!

Back in my comfort zone. It’s as if nothing has changed.

The windy will be inside the hall.

Yeesh!!!

Because all ‘Merkins are clamoring for a president who can
pretend he always makes the pancakes and wears Costco shirts.

Loofah Lad is still pimping for the GOP; he just pretends otherwise.

Shep is in his glory. He can safely ignore the lies in Tampa to focus on his favourite thing: A natural disaster.

Rubio’s got to be just a little bit miffed that Mendacious Mitt chose Lyin’ Ryin’ over Credit Card Marco.

Fox “News” will never tell you about a Republican who switched to the
Democrats, unless it’s to denigrate them. Wait!!! What??? ACORN again???

If Fox “News” ever fact-checked Mendacious Mitt’s ads, like they do
every Democratic advert, no one would ever vote for Mendacious Mitt.

Another Fox “News” report about a D switching to an R, turning it into a national news
story. Yet, you’ll never see the so-called Fair & Balanced network show a R turned D.

More promotion for this softball interview from Wretched Gretched.

Fox “News” cooking the books on every story? We report; you decide.

Translation of Bill “Falafel King” O’Reilly: “Because Karl Rove is a complete nonpartisan in this election cycle and won’t
slant his coverage at all. (Did they buy that? Yes? Good, because I have a doormat and other crap I need to sell.)”

Because Reince Priebus thought he was on Fox “News” and started lying like he always does. OOPS! He was called on it.

And you can believe it because the Romney Camp has been so honest up to now. Oh, hell, who am I trying to fool?

The non-Fair and unBalanced network shouldn’t throw stones, considering the glass house it lives in.

One big fat liar with Mendacious Mitt’s mendacious offspring.

Because we all know how rational Jon Voight is, not to mention how politically astute.

Even though Geico issued a response that called this claim bullshit, nothing in the linked story refers to it.
You’d have to search hard to find out that this happened 2 years ago AND that Geico said Ermey wasn’t fired
at all. That ad campaign had run its course and the company had developed new campaigns in the two years since.

And turns truth on it’s ass.

Does Geraldo even have a Fox “News” presence anymore, now that his tee vee show
has been relegated to one night a week? However, he’s still got a radio show to promote.

Once again: When the polls showed President Obama ahead that sound you heard from Fox “News” was crickets.

Vote for us because we can be just as racist and Ayn Randian
as Ron Paul. We’re just better at disguising our intolerance.

YAWN!!!

See? Shep’s skipping the disaster that is the Republican Convention for the Disaster that is Isaac.

What’s the big secret? She’s a robot, of course.

Wait!!! What???

You can’t tell because his shirt’s not tucked it, but Shep’s got a hard on because he’s covering a natural disaster again.
Unless it’s a Democratic Convention. Fox “News” will do everything
in its power, which is considerable, to shit all over the DNC message.

But Fox “News” is Fair & Balanced/. You can take that to the bank.

“Because it’s not really lying unless I can people to believe me.” ~~~Shorter Rove

According to NewsHounds: “Independent” Bill “Loofah Lad” O’Reilly said that he finds Republicans sane and
Democrats radical. Just another day in the Wild Spin Zone, not to be confused with the Fox “News” Spin Cycle..

There you go, kids, another episode of The Fox “News” Spin Cycle has come and gone. While getting Episode Nine ready for publication, I have already collected the next 23 for Episode Ten. If the Fox “News” bullshit keeps increasing at this rate I’ll not only have to get a pair of hip-waders, but might have to bring in an intern to help. Maybe Wretched Gretched’s intern wants to move over to the dark side.

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The Fox “News” Spin Cycle ► Episode Eight

Bizarro is owned
by DC Comics

It’s time for another in my hugely popular Fox “News” Spin Cycle series. As we get closer to the Republican National Convention, and as the Republican Dynamic Duo of Mendacious Mitt and Lyin’ Ryan flounder on simple issues like abortion, Fox “News” has had to ramp up the Fox “News” Spin Cycle to 11. 

However, to be fair, Mittens ramped up the rhetoric to 11, going full-on Birther mid-day Friday. However that seems to be a topic that Fox “News” has been studiously avoiding as best it can. 

So, join me as we travel back to Bizarro World and look, once again, into the hearts (HA!) and minds (double HA!) of the Fox “News” personalities and lay some snark on those who WHITEwash on behalf of Mendacious Mitt and Paul “Ayn” Ryan.

Aside from the fact that Wretched Gretched never knows where to put capital letters,
Fox “News” wasn’t trumpeting ANY poll numbers before the race tightened up.

Don’t change a thing. Whatever he’s been doing to be the anti-razzle-dazzle candidate has been working for him.

The only reason Fox “News” did this story is they thought it was about Richard Nixon.

Even with the microscope, they have yet to discover Romney’s heart.

Because Mendacious Mitt & Lyin’ Ryan have no extreme positions on
abortion, right? They just want to do away with Roe vs Wade entirely.

Fox “News” loves to attack unionism and this is just a way to get dues-paying unionists to hate their leadership.

No. Next question? Can he win based on lies? A: He’s trying his best.

Another total misrepresentation of what the POTUS said.

Of course, Fox “News” is still not telling its viewers that KKKarl Rove is spending untold
MILLIONS of dollars in SuperPAC money to influence this election. He is NOT “Fair
and Balanced,” but neither is Fox “News.” A match made in Heaven? Or is that Hell?

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama?

Rove could take credit because his SuperPACS are spending TONS of money lying about President Obama.

No surprise there. Mendacious Mitt is rich and White.
Read how Fox “News” is trying to send this story down the Memory Hole.

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama?

They’re . . . err . . . undecided.

Scammity has been promoting this anti-Obama movie for days on end, but
then, to be fair, he has been airing his anti-Obama rants for years on end.

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama?

It’s been a full-court press for Fox “News” in Tampa. While they are promising to cover the
Democratic National Convention, I’ll lay money its coverage will not be as fulsome.

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama.

While Ron Paul identifies as a Republican, the policies he champions are very far from mainstream Republicanism.

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama? Oh! Wait! Never mind.

Republican Charlie Crist has now endorsed President Obama. Don’t hold your breath waiting for Fox “News”
to tell its viewers. However, every time a Democrat comes out for Romney, it’ll become national “news.”

Here’s something Fox “News” won’t tell you. Ever! It’s gone down the Memory Hole.

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama.

More hagiography from the Fox “News” network.

Someone explain to me why Ann Romney has been given a speaker slot at the
convention and why she bumped other, more informed, Republicans.

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama? Oh! Wait! We do every day. Never mind.

Somebody dissed ‘Merka, so Bully Boy Bolling goes all Bully Boy.
Good thing he’s not The Hulk. You wouldn’t want to make him angry.

This lie has been debunked many times, but in order to WHITEwash the EXTREME Republican
position, Fox “News” will feed this crap sandwich to its low-information viewers they’re full.

Another misrepresentation, but you know that already, didn’t you?

Every day Bully Boy Bolling tells his fans about his morning run. Who the fuck cares?

Alisyn still has a lot to learn about cheesecake photography. C’mon, Aly! At least show as much leg as you do on air.

Because it will be a non-stop President Obama bash-a-thon.

There you go, Aly. Leg!
Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama?

Hoo boy!!!

American Crossroads is KKKarl Rove’s SuperPAC, but this is an
interesting way of getting Fox “News” viewers to “Quick! Look over there!”

More promotion for this bullshit documentary, based on a bullshit book that has been thoroughly
debunked already. In other words: It’s perfect for Scammity, who can be debunked every day.

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama? Rush Limbaugh already has. Can’t we?

Bully Boy Bolling is humbled by the Atlantic Ocean, but sadly, not much else.

Is Sarah Palin still a Fox “News” personality? Clearly she’s no longer a Republican
Party personality. She’s not even been invited to the big party this week.

Ingraham is hallucinating. Again!

Notice there are no balancing voices being promoted. Is that fair?

Newsmax totally misrepresented what Reich said, but Fox “News” doesn’t
care about truth. Fox “News” only cares about bashing President Obama.

Speaking of crap sandwiches: Rep. Allen West is a Fox “News” favourite who regularly bashes President
Obama and all Democrats with incendiary language. So, it’s surprise to see his over-the-top criticisms
pushed. Yet, you’ll never see a Democrat’s criticism of West’s crap sandwiches on Fox “News.”

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama?

Still more promotion from Scammity for this bullshit film.

Quick! How can we blame this on President Obama?

Stay tuned for our next exciting episode of the Fox “News” Spin Cycle, where Fox “News” will find a way to blame everything bad in this world on President Obama.

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The Fox “News” Spin Cycle ► Episode Seven

Bizarro is owned by DC Comics.

The Fox “News” Spin Cycle continues to WHITEwash for Mendacious Mitt and Lyin’ Ryan. It really is a trip into Bizarro World where up is down, in is out, and War is Peace. We have always been at war with Oceana. Today’s episode of the Fox “News” Spin Cycleis full of lies, deflections, and just straight-out hilarity. Let’s get right to it before the jokes go stale.

However, on Fox “News” you won’t hear that both candidates have said they won’t attend AND the
only one it says is negatively campaigning is President Obama. Mendacious Mitt’s hands are clean.

Oh noes!!! Can’t have that. Someone dissed St. Ronald of Borax.

I wonder what side Rudy “Noun, Verb, 9/11” falls down on. You’re right, I’m being silly.

Bully Boy Bolling’s bragging again. McDonald’s sells a lot of burgers too. That doesn’t make it the best.
It only proves (once again) that the Fox “News” audience will swallow anything. Clearly they love to hear people yelling
at each other, as opposed to being informed. I reviewed the very first broadcast of “The Five.” Nothing has changed since.

If the snout fits . . . . 
There are those who think Ann Coulter is a swine for her (alleged) two-time voter fraud. Wonder where
she’s registered to vote in this election? If you see her voting, she’s probably in the wrong place again.

Bully Boy Bolling is apologizing because someone pointed out to him that he forgot to greet his fans (fanatics?)
Yet, Bully Boy Bolling never apologizes for his egregious statements against the President and Progressives.
The punchline came this week when Bully Boy Bolling whined no one from the White House would appear on his shows.

KKKarl Rove not only appears on Fox “News” as a SuperPundit, allowed to hide his SuperPACs, spending untold
money to influence this election cycle, he also writes for the Wall Street Journal on all the same topics.
A whole raft of newspaper editorials have taken the WSJ to task for using Rovian logic without pointing
out his clear conflict of interest. The same applies to Fox “News” even more so because of its much larger audience.

Fox “News” is now touting a new poll that says people think the media is left wing and in the tank for
President Obama. This is proof that the Fox “News” lies have taken hold in the minds of the general
public. Five corporations own 95% of the media in ‘Merka and corporations are not left-leaning.

Today’s cheesecake shot, but I don’t understand why that guy on the left isn’t showing more leg.

Fox “News” is trying to make this a First Amendment issue, which blew up in their face later in the day. [See below.]

Is she hopeful the answer will be “No”?

Alysin has a lot to learn about cheesecake photography. At least show as much leg as you do on the air, Aly.

More concern for the RNC than for the islands of Haiti, Jamaica, Cuba, Key West, etc.

Kilmeade loves to send out pics of him hobnobbing with celebrities.

TOO! MANY!! JOKES!!!
Fox “News” has been trying to make people forget all about George W. Bush since January 2009.

The media is also ‘blacking out’ most of the convention, but Laura wants to make this about Ann Romney to stir up ire.
BTW: Fox “News” is the media too. Considering the size of its audience, it’s the mainstream media.

Q: What’s missing in this “The Five” promo? A: Fairness and balance, as always, silly!

Q: Why don’t we know who has contributed to Mendacious Mitt’s campaign?
A: Because his bundlers are kept secret, just like his tax returns.

Remember when Fox “News” was so offended that children were being used
by Progressives? I do. But when the Teapublicans do it, it’s so cute.

Hurricane season comes every year at the same time. Political conventions come every 4 years. Between
conventions they seem to forget about the Hurricane Season, which comes every year at the same time.

Why doesn’t Fox “News” ever tell its audience about KKKarl Rove’s clear conflicts of interest?

This is funny, in a hypocritical way. Fox has been whining for months
about leaks from the White House concerning the Bin Laden raid . . .

. . . Yet Fox “News” spills the real name of the author of a book about the Bin Laden raid and, once that
becomes a media shit storm, tries to paint it as a First Amendment issue with Navy Seals being muzzled.

More hobnobbing with celebrities. Oh, Brian, you lead such an interesting life!

Chris Wallace moves into the field of hagiography. Will there be any tough questions? Romney has already told
reporters he would not answer questions about abortion and/or rape, despite those topics being a part of the RNC platform.

Yet Todd Akin’s position on abortion is exactly the same as Mendacious Mitt’s and Lyin’ Ryan’s.
They’re just smart enough not to repeat the bat-shit crazy stuff about raped women not getting pregnant.

Usually I won’t link to their Wingnuttery. However, this Ablow job, by supposed psychiatrist Keith Ablow, gets
everything about this story bass-ackwards. To Ablow, Akin’s comments “mean that he believes that when
men force themselves on women sexually, and the women are impregnated, that those women consciously
or unconsciously wanted to be fertilized by the men they are identifying as their rapists.  In other words, even
though these women may have said “no,” or may have fought against their assailants, at some level the fact
that they became pregnant meant they and their rapists were creative partners.

WTF?!?!? You need to read the whole thing to see what a fucking nut job Keith Ablow really is.

And, of course, Fox “News” can’t have anything hurt the Republican Party, which they are in the tank for.

See above for Bully Boy Bolling hypocrisy.

Will Fox “News” create a similar graphic to promote the Democratic National Convention? Time will tell.

Wait! What?

Paul “Ayn” Ryan, aka Lyin’ Ryan, voted in favour of this bill. He was for it before he was against it.

This won’t end well for Mendacious Mitt. One of his advisors launched this lawsuit. Way to court the Hispanic vote, Mittens.

You’ll never see Fox “News” promote an opinion piece that’s pro-Obama or negative-Romney.

I’d rather have Judge Napolitano leave me alone. Different strokes and all.

There you have it. Another action-packed episode of the Fox “News” Spin Cycle. Stay tuned for our next episode, where Fox “News” will create new lies in order to WHITEwash Mendacious Mitt and Lyin’ Ryan.

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My Evening With First Lady Michelle Obama

My ticket.

It was a thrill to get my ticket to see The First Lady Michelle Obama. One thing that was less than thrilling: To get the ticket I had to fill out a form on which I left my phone number blank. Before they’d give mer the ticket they insisted I give them my phone number, so I reluctantly did. The night before the First Lady arrived I received 3 calls reminding me the First Lady was coming. The the exact reason I didn’t want to give my phone number: I didn’t want to be bothered by a number of electioneering calls. Three calls for the same thing, within an hour of each other, borders on harassment.

Next year they will combine these
events and you can learn how
to knit your own gun.

The Michelle Obama rally was taking place at Fort Lauderdale’s War Memorial Auditorium, just off Florida’s famous US Route 1 near Sunrise Blvd. In the seven years I’ve lived down here, I’ve not been to War Memorial Auditorum, known as War Memorial to the cognoscenti. Oddly enough, I have been to the Parker Playhouse just catercorner from it. I saw documentarian Ken Burns at the Parker (as the cognoscenti call it), when he brought a preview of his amazing documentary “Prohibition,” and afterwards took questions about his body of work. But never the War Memorial. And, because I approached Parker Playhouse from behind, I didn’t even know War Memorial was there. They hold a lot of different kinds of events at War Memorial Auditorium, as this sign I saw on the way there will testify.

I still have the same 9,514 tunes on my music machine and by happenstance a great Sly and Robbie Reggae tune was blasting out of my windows when I arrived. Several people gave me a thumbs up. However, when that ended “Brown Sugar” started playing. I said, yeah, yeah, yeah, OOOoooo! I wish I was making this up.

There were loads of people and several fire trucks gathered around the front doors. The fire trucks were necessary because of the 95 degree heat. I saw more than one person drop and need medical attention. The line snaked around the side of the building and there were several hundred people there before I arrived. We settled in for a long wait. Doors were scheduled to open at 3:00, but my part of the line didn’t get in until about 4:30. When I finally got to the doors I looked back. The line stretched way beyond the point where I originally joined it.

Monument near the doors.
Finally near the doors.

While we waited in line volunteers kept working the crowd, making sure everybody was registered to vote and to see who wanted to volunteer to help President Obama win the election. There was another group of volunteers who worked the crowd to alert us that we couldn’t bring in umbrellas, which many in the crowd carried to protect themselves from the oppressive sun, or cameras. This instruction puzzled a lot of people, who were all carrying cameras, and it had to be explained over and over again. The first explanation was that  phone cameras were okay, but no other cameras. That also puzzled a lot of people, like myself, who were carrying stand-alone cameras. “Why are phone cameras allowed, but not other cameras?!?!” People were getting hot, and it wasn’t entirely from the heat. A lot of people had cameras and it’s only natural to want to document the day you saw the First Lady of the United States. It’s something you’ll want to show your children and grandchildren, provided the Mayans are wrong. Then it was clarified that small cameras, like mine, were allowed by not “big cameras.” However, the volunteers were unable to define “big camera” to anyone’s satisfaction. I presume they meant a 35mm camera with a telephoto lens, but who knows.

Far more amusing: Women were told that large purses were not allowed, which just made all the women near me in line laugh. Most of them had large purses, some the size of small suitcases. The volunteers couldn’t define “large purse,” just as they couldn’t define “big cameras.” 

One other thing that was odd is they confiscated all signs from the people in line, only to pass out signs to people once we got into the auditorium. What’s up with that?

I wanted to take a picture of the security at the door, but as soon as I leveled my camera I got yelled at. When one is being yelled at by Fort Lauderdale police AND Broward Sheriff officers AND the Secret Service, ALL AT THE SAME TIME, one tends to do EXACTLY as they demand. That’s why there are no picture of that part of my adventure. However, I can describe it. All cell phones and cameras had to be turned on and handed to an officer, who inspected them and made sure they were operable. Purses, fanny packs, and knapsacks were also handed to the officers who searched them extensively. Everyone passed through metal detectors and then were ‘wanded’ on the other side. It was all quite similar to boarding an airplane, except we could keep our shoes on and there were no X-ray machines.

The other major difference to the airport security checkpoints: Everyone took it with good humour because we all understood that The First Lady’s safety trumped (no pun intended) any small inconvenience we might have experienced.

What follows are just some of the 218 pics I took once I was inside War Memorial Auditorium.

There was a time in my media career I would have been sitting on the other side of this barrier.

There was a time in my media career when  I would have been field producing segments like this.

Fort Lauderdale Mayor John P. “Jack” Seiler gets to say a few words to the crowd.
Several people gave pre-game show speeches. Debbie Wasserman Schultz received
the biggest round of applause. She is clearly well-loved by her constituents.

The First Lady must have been delayed at the last minute because I have never seen an intermission after the introductory speeches have already begun. These speeches are supposed to get the crowd revved up for the Main Act. However, they announced from the stage that there would be a 40 minute intermission before the First Lady would come out. That allowed the crowd to both mingle and push closer to the stage. Since it was starting to get a little tight where I was standing I decided to move back, which is why some of my pictures of The First Lady are less clear.

Intermission with an out-of-focus tee vee review stand in the background.

Doing a breathless for Spanish-speaking viewers during intermission.
This woman and the woman seated shared the same cameraman, but spoke different languages.

I finally got pushed back behind the tee vee review stand and had to move to the side to have any view of the stage at all.
The First Lady didn’t need warm-up acts. As soon as she was announced the crowd went nuts!!!

I have far too many pics like this. No sooner would I line up a shot, than someone in front of me held up their hands.

I was able to move a bit closer and had a better angle.

When First Lady Michelle finished her speech the crowd went crazy, shouting “Four! More!! Years!!! Four! More!! Years!!!” “

Then Mrs. Obama came down to the ‘rope line’ metal barriers and talked to people personally.

There was such a crush to get close to her, I couldn’t even get close enough to get a picture.

One of the officers who kept as all safe.

Seeing a First Lady was a heady experience. People left smiling, laughing and singing. It took forever to get out of the parking lots, but everyone was in such a good mood there was none of the typical jockeying for position one might see leaving a sporting event, for example.

All in all, it was a great experience, although a hot one.

The Fox “News” Spin Cycle ► Episode Six

Bizarro is owned
by DC comics

It’s getting harder and harder to keep up with the Fox “News” Spin Cycle. As the GOP flounders with trying to define legitimate vs illegitimate rape; trying to pretend there’s a difference between what Todd Akin said and what the Romney-Ryan team believe; and covering for all of Mendacious Mitt’s lies and Etch-A-Sketch moments, Fox “News” is forced to spin faster and wilder than ever. Mendacious Mitt and Paul “Ayn” Ryan need Fox “News” to WHITEwash their words and record because the truth would force people to go running to the Democratic Party.

So join me as I unpack the latest episode of the Fox “News” Spin Cycle.

What’s repulsive is how Fox “News” brings KKKarl Rove on all the time and neglects to mention that he’s
spending UNTOLD millions on influencing the same election he’s repulsed by. It’s also repulsive that
Mendacious Mitt Romney played the “he’s not one of us” card, but you’ll never hear that on Fox “News” either.

If all you have is a Hemmer, every problem looks like a Nial, or something like that.
Because Ferguson made up some shit about the POTUS, he’s a Fox “News” favourite now.

Fox “News” hates electric cars. I’m not sure why, but there it is.

This MoFo again? Why doesn’t Fox “News” ever tell us that he’s behind “American Crossroads”???

I sure hope he does the banana thing all over again.

This has been debunked several times, yet Fox “News” keeps pushing this phony bologna.

Shorter “Monumantal”: It’s all God’s doing and we’re blessed that he even takes time to give us His consideration.

Of course that’s not true either.

Fox “News” isn’t called God’s Favourite Network for nothing. Bible game show host & Kirk Cameron all on the same day?

The strange case is that he’s the VP and you’re not.

Nothing but deflection.

Of course to hear Loofah Lad tell it, Romney’s running a honest
campaign with no low blows. That would be false, of course.

This MoFo again. He didn’t tell the truth during the last administration, and he’s certainly not telling the truth now.

Yet Gibbs was absolutely spot on: He said that Trump is a Right Wing Birther. Dispute that!!!

Because he’s losing!!!

Not if Fox “News” can help it.

Yes! it hadn’t been started yet.

Fox “News” promotes KKKarl Rove and he has a 2 bulging bank accounts in his 2 SuperPACs.

Quick! How can we blame this on the President?

Bully Boy Bolling is never Fair & Balanced. Ever!!!
QUICK! How can we blame this on the President?

But President Obama is the one spilling secrets.

You know a campaign is in trouble when it starts recycling Sarah Palin catch phrases from 4 years ago.

Did you know that every time someone uses the phrase “You didn’t build that” Fox “News” gets royalties for creating the lie?
He’s going to sky-dive in from the rafters and surprise everybody. What? He won’t? OH! Never mind!!!

More royalties for Fox “News” for “Doing a Brietbart” with a deceptively edited tape. You didn’t say that. Not really.
How could he be so crass?!?! Everyone knows that Romney was born with a silver foot in his mouth.

A deceptive headline.

A deceptive headline with a picture that makes the POTUS look like he’s smelling Romney’s farts.

Q: How many softball interviews are they going to give this guy? A: As many as it takes.

When the half-Governor is right, wake me up. When Greta stops kissing her ass, wake me up. I feel like Rip Van Winkle.

The EPA is not Obama’s EPA. If you really wanna know the truth, it’s Nixon’s.

Bully Boy Bolling, who uses a teleprompter, gets a kick out of a POTUS teleprompter picture.
Hey Eric! You know that Romney uses a teleprompter too, doncha?

The daily cheesecake from Fox and Friends First.

God’s channel has a beef to pick with Atheists. I have a beef to pick with Wretched Gretched. Are we even?

Another anti-Obama book? QUICK! Let’s promote it.

Is Fox “News” already making the case that Mendacious Mitt’s loss will be due to evil librul media?

Let’s promote this softball interview again.

I guess not, because he stayed in the race, Laura.

Fox “News” is doing everything in its power to keep this grudge match going.

I don’t care what Fox “News” says: It’s still Bush’s fault.

Monica Crowley is not Fair & Balanced. She’s also not very smart. GOP needs to win for the country? Oh, puh-leeze.

Oh, I hope so. That will be fun. Pass the popcorn.

If the snout fits . . . .
***
***

The Fox “News” Spin Cycle ► Episode Five

Bizarro is owned by DC Comics

It was a busy day for the The Fox “News” Spin Cycle because it was the day AFTER Todd Akins (Republican Idiot) said that women who have been “legitimately raped” won’t get pregnant because they have internal lasers that shoot down the offending sperm, or something like that. 

I didn’t quite understand it all, but he was quoting learned doctors, not to mention the fact that Akin’s on the House of Representatives Science Committee, so he must know what he’s talking about. Consequently, Fox “News” was spinning FURIOUSLY in order to get their brain dead viewers not to think about lady parts and internal lasers. It was just another adventure in Bizarro World, so let’s take a look, shall we?

Since Fox “News” can’t have that thought hanging out there, they have to denigrate this Democratic Senator.

Remember in the last presidential election how VP Biden called Giuliani “a noun and a verb and 9/11”? This is payback.

That’s the debate I’m waiting for.
I suspect the POTUS will trounce Mendacious Mitt, who will have to lie his way through it.

Of course Gibbs is 100% right. Trump is clearly Right Wing and has even promoted
Birtherism to Wretched Gretched on one of his previous Monday morning phone-ins.

Now Brian Kilmeade is messaging for Wretched Gretched? Of course
their agenda is political. They’re connected to both the GOP and Birtherism.

Fox and Friends First send out a lot of cheesecake pics. Here’s one.

Fox and Friends First ask a lot of stupid questions. Here’s one.

This is what passes for Fox “News” viewer porn. More cheesecake.

You just knew this was going to get a lot of play on Fox “News,” and it was front and center all day.

Not only promoting Fox and Friends, but Kilmeade and Friends, the Brian Kilmeade lie-a-thon on radio.

WAIT!!! WHAT??? This has nothing to do with politics. How did that get in there?

You’d like to think so, wouldn’t you Loofah Lad?

TWEET!!! Dog whistle!!! TWEET!!!

Will they ever have Eric Boehlert on to defend himself? Oh, wait! What the hell was I thinking?

America needs to remember whatever Fox “News” and Karl Rove tells it to remember, as they just make shit up.

See how Fox “News” wants to change the narrative, since the last one didn’t work so well?

A two-fer: Rudy “Noun Verb 911” Giuliani gets to attack VP Biden *AND* allege media bias in case that doesn’t work

An unsourced series of allegations and quotes. Perfect for Fox “News,” which needs no facts.

What Fox “News will never tell you: Karl Rove’s American Crossroads his other
SuperPAC has more money to spend on this election than almost any other single entity.
If money really can buy the White House, Rove could get his old job back.

Chains? Jobs? Tell us again how you didn’t really sexually harass those women, Herman.

Therefore, Fox “News” has to go on the attack all over again and promote the SEALS’ specious speculation.

Because it wasn’t his ad and the Right Wing totally distorted the message, just
like it did with “You didn’t build that” and “We tried our way and it worked.”

This was before Fox “News” came out in favour of Akin dropping out of the race.

KKKarl Rove is hoping and praying that money will buy an election. In fact, he’s counting on it.
What he won’t tell you in his appearances on Fox “News” is how much he’s spending to influence the election.

More about campaign money. Anything to try and damage the Obama brand.

Is Sarah still a Fox “News” personality? Todd Palin is in this show (on another network) that she’s promoting.

There it is, folks. Episode Five done come and gone. I already have enough saved up for Episodes Six and Seven. I may have to start on them right away.

***
***

My First First Lady

My coveted ticket

I managed to score a ticket to see First Lady Michelle Obama on Wednesday. I am on her mailing list and she wrote to me personally, along with thousands and thousands of others, that she was coming to town and would just love to see me.

She gave three locations where her minions, aka the President Obama Re-election Campaign workers, would be giving out FREE tickets to see her on a First Come, First Served, one ticket per person basis.

Since there were a finite amount of tickets and, I presumed, an infinite number of people who would want them, I decided I would get there early. So for the 1:00 PM call I was shooting to arrive at high noon and, thinking there was a possibility I would be standing in the 95 degree heat for a while, 3 frozen bottles of water, only one of which would fit in my pocket.

The Obama Re-election office was less than 5 miles away, so it took only about 15 minutes to get there. However, I go no where without my new, little Sansa music machine. It’s a terrific machine, smaller than a pack of matches. It has an internal 8 GB hard drive, and a slot for micro-memory card, in which I added another 16 GB of memory, giving me a grand total of 9,514 tunes of every genre you can name. I throw the thing on random shuffle and head out, windows open. Just as I pull up to the people lined up outside the the songs switches from a Reggae tune to, and I wish I were making this up, Louis Armstrong’s version of “Shine.”

There were about 50 people ahead of me when I arrived.

Luckily no one already standing in line was paying attention to the music emanating from my car. I joined the line and waited. And waited. And waited. I was disconcerted. Every 5 minutes someone new came by and asked us to fill out a form and to make sure we had our 2012 Voter Registration Card ready, or we’d not get tickets. Every 5 minutes I explained to somebody new that I don’t have a 2012 Voter Registration Card because I wasn’t allowed to vote. When a one of the volunteers asked if if it was because I was a felon, I changed my response to “I don’t have a 2012 Voter Registration Card because I’m not a citizen.” That didn’t make me many friends either, but at least I wasn’t mistaken for a felon.

Even though they were all telling us we needed a Voters Registration Card to get a ticket, when I explained they said “Don’t worry about it,” but I was. Mostly because they all kept saying we needed it to get the ticket, before they told me privately that I didn’t need it to get a ticket. That didn’t give me much assurance, especially because I heard many people arguing with the volunteers. Loud voices were yelling, “If we needed to bring out Voters Registration Card, it should have been in the email!!!” and “I don’t take my Voter Registration Card everywhere I go!!!” and “You people done fucked up!!!”

In the end no one asked anyone for a voter registration card once we were getting out ticket to see the First Lady, so all that anger and frustration in line seemed to be just for the fun and entertainment of the volunteers.

I arrived at noon and left at 1:45, most of that time standing in the oppressive heat. I had long finished the frozen water I carried and when I got back to the car the other two bottles were almost completely melted, but at least they were still cold.

Here are a few of the other pics I took while waiting.

Still life: Gecko with cockroach on a wall. In Florida they call these Palmetto bugs so they can pretend they’re not roaches.

I tried to get one of these signs for my window, but they didn’t have any more. There was also one that said
“African Americans for Obama” which I wanted, because I have racist neighbours, but they were out of those too.

***
***

The Fox “News” Spin Cycle ► Episode Four

Bizarro is owned by DC Comics

Having been incredibly busy the last few days, I’ve not been able to monitor the Fox “News” SPIN Cycle as much as I would have liked. However, that doesn’t mean the Fox “News” SPIN has been any less furious and, even though I have only been half-paying attention, I still have a fuller plate of Fox “News” nonsense than I did in Episode One, or Episode Two, or Episode Three of this ongoing series. 

It falls down into several categories: It’s either designed to denigrate this administration; WHITEwash the Romney-Ryan distortion, lies, or flubs; promote the Romney-Ryan ticket as the best thing since McCain-Palin; denigrate people not like them; or just distract from the problems of the day.

So, let’s dip our toe back into Bizarro World and see where that takes us.

Jesse Watters is used as comic relief these days  on Fox “News,” but started out as the Bill “Loofah Lad” O’Reilly
ambush interview guy, asking people when they stopped beating their wife, or some such nonsense, while they’re
on vacation, or in their driveway. However, now he’s comic releif and just not funny. The current MO: He goes out
with a camera and does “man on the street” interviews, which are then edited together to make people look stupid.
Here he plays Goodwill Ambassador with visiters to ‘Merka and, in the end, makes them look foolish by
their lack of deep knowledge about ‘Merkin politics. Why should they know about ‘Merkin politics, other than
to know how they get screwed by what happens here?

Because softball interviews are not enough, Greta moves into the field of hagiography.
Remember how she kept bringing Sarah Palin on the air hoping she could get people to like a Mama Grizzly?
All you need to know is the source is Breitbart. Lying to the world is known as “Doing a
Breitbart”and believing a Breitbart lie is called “Swallowing an ACORN.”
OH NOES! A protester gets out of hand. Nothing like those Tea Party protests, where Congressional
Representatives were spit upon and called horrible names. “Doing the Breitbart,” when Andrew was still
alive, was to say because it wasn’t captured on video, it never happened. And, because we can deceptively
edit a video, it’s the absolute truth because, LOOK!, it’s on video.

Another promotion of Van Susterin’s hagiography, because it can’t be pushed enough.

Paul Ryan at (in?) The Villages. Fox “News” will carry the whole thing live, but rarely do they
cover a speech by the President of the United States beyond the first few minutes.

A gag reel of VP Biden flubs. I’ve never seen a gag reel of, as just one example, George W. Bush’s flubs,
who was well-known for malapropisms and he even flubbed ‘Merka right into an illegal war.

Paul Ryan has mommy issues, or he will when she figures out what his policies will do for the aged.
However, they got tons of money, so whatever Ryan proposes wouldn’t affect her at all. Never mind.

But, of course, Mediaite has a very different take, otherwise Fox “News” never would have promoted this article.

“Doing the Breitbart” is also a dance and when the tunes starts playing some
people start kicking up their feet to dance along.

Fox “News” Sunday does a lot of these “polls.” While Chris Wallace always makes a point to say on air that the
polls are not scientific (and there would be a shit storm if he didn’t) the low-information Fox “News” viewer still
takes the polls as gospel, especially when the results are so one-sided, like above. Yet, the respondents are already
preselected because they are all Fox “News” viewers. Their only knowledge of the issue being polled has been the
steady drip, drip, drip of what Fox “News” has told them. It’s like asking McDonald’s employees whether they prefer
a Big Mac or KFC chicken.

Haw, haw, haw!!!
A big picture of a big fish just proves who’s really floundering. Don’t tale the bait.

What you’ll never hear on Fox “News” is that the Navy Seals are lying and connected to Birthersism and the GOP.

Karl Rove (Why isn’t he in jail?) is hoping that money will win the election. What you’ll never hear on
Fox “News” is the fact that Karl Rove (No, really, why isn’t he in jail?) runs SuperPACs spending
unprecedented amounts of untraceable money in this election cycle.

“QUICK! How can we lay this off on the Commander in Chief?”

Another Dr. Keith Ablow job. He not only diagnoses the VP, but then goes after the POTUS as well.
Can you say “unprofessional”? I knew you could.

“QUICK! Look over there!!!”

“QUICK!!! Look over there at Ecuador.”

TWEET! Dog whistle from Weaselzippers. Be afraid!!! Be very afraid!!!

Yet polling suggests that people believe the administration’s take on Medicare. Therefore, Charlie must sew doubt.

Let’s parse this one from Shark Tank, shall we? “Desperate”? That’s a matter of opinion. “Democrats”? We
don’t know that for sure. Maybe they just don’t like people who misuse their privilege. “Heckle Romney”?
Oh Em Gee!!! Of course we can’t have that. Pass the smelling salts. However, when a Senator yells “You
lie” during the President’s SOTU address, or a reporter heckles the Predinet while he’s making an
announcement in the Rose Garden, it’s all hand on deck for Fox “News” to smooth over those rough spots.

Hannity went fishing with the former Vice President. Why aren’t both of them in jail yet? Don’t take the bait.

Right, because the best thing is to play the “false equivalency card” that both parties do it,
but Democrats do it more and always have. The GOP has just been forced to respond in kind.

You won’t hear this anywhere else, as Fox “News” loves to tell its viewers.
That’s because other news outlets don’t traffic in bullshit.

Let me guess: Secretary of Hair? Head of the Department of Birtherism?

Because no one has ever told Romney not to show up, or not to use their music at campaign events, right?

I’ve written elsewhere how Gretched (rhymes with wretched) mangles the English language, so we can ignore
the “ger” and lack of proper punctuation. Yet, it can still be FIXED!!! Try this instead because it’s more truthful:
“Start with Biden end with Seals…no time for Beckel, who will make a fool of himself anyway. Dont [sic] Miss It!!”

Former Governor John Sununu waent ballistic when he appeared on CNN and was challenged on his factually
challenged talking points. So he shouted at the host, “Wear an Obama bumper sticker on your forehead when
you say that.” Better to find a safe harbour on Hannity where all the softball questions will be framed in a
way that allows Sununu to trash the president.

After a number of Nobel Peace Prize winners, including Reverend Desmond Tutu, denounced this show as
glorifying war, Fox “News” had to come to its defense. The fact that Todd Palin is in the show is just coincidental.

But still nothing on how some of these guys are connected to Birtherism. And, they are GOP operatives,
but have a great answer for that: Waving the flag: YOU! ESS!! EH!!! YOU! ESS!! EH!!! YOU! ESS!! EH!!!

Because Fox “News” can’t push this faux outrage on the misrepresentation of the “chains” comment enough.

Fox “News” will never tell you that frequent talking head Karl Rove (Why isn’t he in jail?) has a
SuperPAC that is spending record amounts of money to influence this election.

Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. Prior to Romney choosing Ryan as his VP pick GOP
pundits were saying it could be worth an 11-point bounce. When the choice of Ryan didn’t move the
needle, now Karl Rove (No, really, why isn’t he in jail?) wants you to believe it’s meaningless.

What a guy!!!

This was the bullshit story of the week. No sources. No confirmation. Cupcakes for everyone!!!

What a guy!!! He’s a hunk!!!

And it’s all Obama’s fault.

Hear that dog whistle? Welfare moms! One silly story in one silly place and Fox “News” elevates it to the national dialogue.

A rare Three-Fer sourced from The Daily Caller, which has proven to be in the tank for Mendacious Mitt.
By repeating the story Fox “News” gets to repeat the demonstrably false claims the Navy Seals are making
against President Obama, gets to attack Media Matters, and then goes after the tax exempt status of
Media Matters for America. I saw them do all of this while discussing this story on air.

That’s all for today, folks. Stay tuned for our next exciting adventure in the Fox “News” Spin Cycle, that spins so fast it’ll make you dizzy.

***
***

The Fox “News” Spin Cycle ► Episode Three

Bizarro is owned by DC Comics

The Fox “News Spin Cycle is working overtime, which means I am having to work overtime just to keep up with it. You can see how scared Fox “News” is by how furious the SPIN cycle is working to WHITEwash the Romney-Ryan ticket. They must be reading the same polling I am: Their own.

Episode One of this series ran on Monday. Thirty-two hours later there was enough for Episode Two with sixteen entries. Now just 11 hours later, I have enough for Episode Three and I even culled some. If it keeps up at this rate, this could become a full time job.

But, enough about me. Let’s get to the highlights lowlights: It’s all dog whistles, lies, and general weirdness.

Dog whistle: The First Lady had some things to say about Affirmative Action on campus way back then. TWEET!

Bully Boy Bolling’s testosterone-fueled Faux Outrage Machine. Man up? Fox “News” has the franchise on Faux Outrage and soon it will be offering a Buy One, Get One sale. I recommend waiting for the deep discount.

Dog Whistle: Immigrants!!! Be afraid!!! Be very afraid!!! TWEET!

While we all need to condemn violence, this story is a rare-two-fer for Fox “News.” It has Chick-fil-A and a gunman shooting at Conservatives, aka the Family Research Council, which “some people say” is just comprised of intolerant assholes. Immediately Fox “News” jumped into action: Megyn Kelly called this a case of Domestic Terrorism. Yet when a mad gunman shot and killed several people at a Sikh Temple in Colorado, Megyn Kelly hosted Judge Andrew Napolitano who said that shooting WAS NOT Domestic Terrorism. However, he insisted the Fort Hood shooting WAS. Consistency has never been a strong suit of Fox “News” or Libertarian Judge Nap.
Would you be surprised that this was a total distortion of what was said? Me neither.

Remember: It’s only swiftboating if it’s not true. This is swiftboating at its finest.

Bill “Loofah Lad” O’Reilly just had to get into the act.

Why wouldn’t he defend his VP from the Faux Outrage Machine?

Mama Grizzly just had to get in on the act. “Some people say” perpetual victim
Sarah Palin invented the Faux Outrage Machine. Patent Pending.

This is the softball interview with Brit Hume, when Pakul Ryan threw Ayn Rand under the bus.
He was for her before he was against her. REMEMBER: You can’t spell Ryan without A-Y-N.

More testosterone, trying to make it appear as if Romney actually has some balls.
Look at all those CAPITAL LETTERS! It must be true!
Hannity sent out many promotions for his friendly, softball radio interview with Paul Ryan…
…and he gets Ryan to go to the Faux Outrage Machine. Who’s desperate?
If this was your big take-away from the interview, Hannity? It must have been dull as hell.

He’s not only buff, but he’s a rainmaker too.
REMEMBER: You can’t spell Romney without M-O-N-E-Y.

Another promotion for his softball interview with Brit Hume. I flunked Chemistry.

Wait!!! What??? How did this accurate assessment get loose? Ahhh, I see now.
It’s “sad” that women hate the GOP, who want to put a meter on their vaginas. Got it!

I don’t know what to make of this one. Of course it’s a way to slam a Democrat, who had once called herself Bisexual, but now identifies as Pansexual. But, brunette??? What do they have against brunettes? Oh wait! It’s Fox “News” where being blonde almost seems to be a job requirement.

It’s not that difficult for SOME people to prove who they are. This ruloing, unless it’s overturned, is going to create chaos on election day, which is probably what the GOP wants.
You don’t hear much about these Koch suckers on Fox “News.”
Here Fox “News” outsourced the job to Newsmax.

And that, dear readers, is Episode Three of The Fox “News” Spin Cycle. If the pace keeps up as it has been, Episode Four will be ready as soon as you finish reading Episode Three.

***
***

The Fox “News” Spin Cycle ► Episode Two

Bizarro is owned by DC Comics

Who knew that when I posted Episode One of the The Fox “News” Spin Cycle, there would be enough material for a new episode
just 32 hours later? And, I’m not even searching for these gems. I just
collect them as they hit my facebook feed. 

However,
that’s an indication of how hard the Fox “News” Spin Cycle is working,
having ratcheted itself into overdrive in order to WHITEwash the Romney-Ryan ticket. 

Today’s
Silliest Thing In The World™ is the new faux outrage on the Right: Vice
President Joe Biden mentioned CHAINS and the Faux Outrage Machine
assumes he was talking about slavery. Now apologies are being demanded
and people on my facebook feed want to argue the point with me. 

IRONY ALERT: Bully Boy Bolling wondering about “journalistic integrity”vs “media bias

While it’s not true, of course, it’s still better than letting the auto industry go bankrupt

The context? VP Biden said that Romney wants to UNCHAIN Wall Street.
But any mention of chains automatically refers to slavery, right?
Bully Boy Bolling certainly knows “media bias” since it’s all he does.
Hey, Eric? Fox “News” is the mainstream media.

I think Bully Boy Bolling is obsessing. Thin skin much?

This is my favourite: Bully Boy Bolling mistook Mediaite’s accurate reporting
on what The Five said as support for what The Five said. That’s just sad.

Already laying the groundwork to say the debate moderators are in the tank for President Obama.

Maddow gave as good as she got, when Lowry actually
let her talk, but he just kept yelling “Can you answer?”
***

***
OMG!!! He praised bipartisanship!!!

Romney guy blows his gasket and Fox Nation thinks that’s “crushing” the anchor.

Oddly enough nothings is said about “Romney Man” blowing the talking points.

Oh! Stop!! My!!! Sides!!!!

Backhanded criticism: Mittens Romney does use a
telepromter, as does ever “news” personality on Fox.
Backhanded criticism: Romney was boring before he met Ryan.

Hoo boy!!!

The Obama Camp knows that Romney couldn’t draw that crowd by himself. More backhanded criticism.
***
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